These Dreams
by Late March
Summary: slightly AU; the tormentor...the lover...the watcher...the fighter..."Free me", he says, "And I will never leave you."...Love...haunted by a watcher, Kaoru struggles to escape, but soon finds that she doesn't want to...
1. intrusion

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

Yes! A new story! A finished story! Note the key word: finished…I can assure you that this story is completed in all its myriad forms. You'll never have to curse me for my bad updating again! You can even ask my beta reader (she's awesome!)

**NOTE: My updates will now come on a strictly periodic basis. One chapter a month, on the first of the month. Period.**

_Historical note: I have messed with the timeline slightly. Kenshin is younger, Kaoru is the same age, as are Yahiko and Sano. The Bakumatsu was only five years ago._

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta-reader, the __**Kiyomi **__half of __**Banana Rum**__._

_Posted: June 1, 2008_

**.:**These**…**Dreams**:.**

**.:**chapter**.**one**.**intrusion**:.**

**Song(s) to Listen to While Reading**: "Black Roses Red" by Alana Grace; "Main Title" by: James Newton Howard (Peter Pan); "These Dreams" by Heart

"_The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. 'Where shall I begin, Your Majesty?' he asked._

'_Begin at the beginning,' the king said very gravely. 'and go on till you reach the end; then stop.'"_

_- Lewis Carroll, __"Alice in Wonderland"__._

Kamiya Kaoru sighed and shook her head as she took a half burnt candle from the cabinet and lit it. As usual, Yahiko had forgotten to leave one out for her and there was no counting on Sano for anything other than fighting and eating food. Still, they were her only real friends in the world, ones who tolerated her faults, ones she could never bring herself to give up. No matter what they did, Kaoru loved them. Her fingers trembled as she disposed of the match and held the candle up behind one hand. She shivered violently as a cold wind came rushing through the dojo. Along with it came bad memories of darkness and of pain and of death.

But there really wasn't any reason to be thinking of those memories at a time like this. She shut the kitchen door firmly to prevent that wind from entering again, just to be safe.

In a nearby room she could hear Yahiko snoring loud enough to disturb the peaceful night. And since Sano was a surprisingly light sleeper, she didn't know how he could get a wink of sleep. Coming close to her own room, Kaoru's thoughts were brought to loneliness. Even with Sano and Yahiko living with her, she wished for something more. There was no one for her to stare at late at night. Or even to think about during the moon's temporary reign. As she thought longingly about laying down on her futon, pulling the blankets up and fading into sleep, she knew that it would be a long night. Thoughts of love would haunt her.

For as long as she could remember, Kaoru had always dreamed of a valiant samurai who feared no one, not even the Hitokiri Battousai, who was said to have demonic powers. He had a shinning katana and gleaming eyes; he would slay any monster terrorizing her. And then he would whisk her far away, to live high in the mountains where legend was abundant. There she would live with her loving samurai, watching over their children, and living life contentedly. But he had never come. Her samurai had never swept her off her feet, away from daily life.

When the Bakumatsu had drawn to a close and her father was found near to death in a devious forest a half year before the last battle, Kaoru had assumed full responsibility of the dojo her father had given half his life to. But that hadn't stopped her from still hoping for her samurai. After a year or so, when the only man to come her way had been Sano, a large portion of Kaoru's dreams had died, laying themselves down to sleep forever. After that, she had decided to keep her own counsel in many things. The men of her village were all too old, too young, or permanently crippled, body and soul. No one appealed to her, and her only desire seemed to be a simple life filled with friends.

The death of her father played a monumental role in that. He had been the driving force in her life. Since her mother had passed away when she was three, Kaoru was a natural tomboy. Her father had taught her to cook, which accounted for her serious lack of skills in that area. Her father had given her a gi and hakama instead of a kimono. He had taught her swordsmanship, not proper ladylike manners. Her father had been everything to her.

The fact that it had been said that her father had come out alive from a duel with the Hitokiri Battousai was nothing but a constant source of pride to Kaoru. Many people had scoffed at her father's non-killing ways over the years, determined to drag such ideals down. But Kamiya Koshijiro had been left by the Battousai in a forest alone to die, and it was proof enough of his strength that even that happened. Hours thereafter, lying in a rural doctor's clinic, Koshijiro had sent his daughter a very curious letter, delivered with his effects after his death.

He had been carrying with him a very recent picture of her, he wrote. During the fight, it had slipped out of his gi, where he always kept it.

'_To my astonishment, my opponent halted. He stopped and bent down to pick up your picture Kaoru. I watched him stare at you curiously, for as he did so, he flicked the blood from his blade. After agonizing_ _a few __moments, Battousai stalked over to me. His gait was odd, smooth._

_He stared at me, then folded your photograph and tucked it into my hand. My heart turned cold when he did this, for I was sure that his intention was to kill me then, when I was prone, but he obviously did not. All this man did was lean closer. He put his mouth to my ear and whispered, "My bride would not like it if I killed her father."_

_And then he vanished.'_

That had occurred when Kaoru was fifteen, and supposedly the same age as the Hitokiri Battousai.

Only six hours after the fateful encounter, Koshijiro had been pronounced dead; killed off by a violent infection.

When the letter first arrived, Kaoru had been terrified that the assassin would come for her. At that time, she'd had no one to stay with her; the large dojo had been empty and echoing. Sano and Yahiko had not yet fallen into her life, and the neighbors had still been giving her space to mourn properly. All she had been able to think about was the way Battousai's katana would slice through her soft flesh after he'd taken his pleasure from her unwilling body. She had even seriously considered packing up and moving, consulted her few remaining friends about her plans. But in the end, the expenses would have proved too much had she decided to do so.

Now that she had turned nineteen, a better control on her emotions, and more security in her holdings, Kaoru had serious doubts that the revered and feared assassin would seek her out. Sano, once known as the infamous and unbeatable Zanza, had a lot to do with that security, as did her own improved skills in swordsmanship. And Yahiko was as good an ear as any Bakumatsu spy for rumors. She was safe.

Sliding her bedroom door open, Kaoru turned back with a softly uttered "Kuso." She had forgotten to put away the rice. Since it was either Yahiko or Sano who cooked the dubious meals, Kaoru was usually the one to clean up afterward. And she knew from experience that food left out at night would be gone by morning, with muddy raccoon tracks scattered about.

Her feet padded into the kitchen, thoroughly annoyed with the obstacle between her and her futon. There she felt the rush of wind again. This time it felt warm, caressing, and searching. She stopped, and turned to see that the door was open, the very door that she had closed before heading down the hall. Brow furrowed, Kaoru trotted over and looked about that end of the room. She didn't know of any wild animals capable of opening doors on their own.

So the only logical conclusion was that there was a human intruder lurking about.

She poked one hand outside towards the training yard and wiggled it, waiting for something to latch onto it. When something failed to happen, she stuck her head out, feeling incredibly foolish. There didn't seem to be anything out of the ordinary, although it was too dark for her to tell for sure. Kaoru squinted and squinted, but try as she might, nothing caught her attention; until her eye seized upon one hint of movement by the gate. Faint though it was, it was enough for her.

Kaoru jogged back down the hall, her heart pounding in a rapid beat against her chest. She'd only had one other break-in scare in her entire life. It had been only two weeks after her father's death and she had found no hard evidence of a trespasser, but it had scared her to the very marrow of her bones. Being a fifteen year old, alone in a large dojo, with no family to speak of, did not promote confidence after a break-in. She had sat awake late into the night for weeks afterward out of fear.

Reaching Sano's door, she threw it open. "Sano!"

He was awake within seconds, looking up at her from the comfort of his futon. "What is it Jou-chan?"

"I think I saw something outside when I went to put the rice away."

No other explanation was needed. Sano's face hardened as he stood up and he cracked his knuckles on the way to the kitchen. He was very serious when it came to protecting his "little sister". But when they got there, the kitchen door was closed. Shut firmly and looking like it had never been open. Sano turned to her. "Jou-chan, was this some kind of joke?"

"No!" Kaoru swore the door had been open.

"Jou-chan?" He gave her a questioning look, still not believing her.

Kaoru put her hands on his forearms. "Sano, I'm serious. It was open just a few minutes ago." She injected some of the real panic that she was holding back into her voice, because she could remember the feelings that had plagued her after the last break-in all too well. "I don't know why this is happening either."

He studied her face intently, then sighed. "Alright. If you really want me to, I'll go have a look around. But only after you tell me why this has you so rattled."

"Later Sano! They might still be out there!"

Since Sano couldn't refute her point, he headed out dutifully, ready to defend the dojo. While he was gone, Kaoru put away the rice she had originally come out for, spilling a good amount in the process. Cleaning it up took awhile, and when Sano didn't come in after all that, she began to worry that he actually had found an intruder. Luckily, Sano stomped back in just as Kaoru was wondering if she could wake Yahiko up through all his snores.

"Nothing out there Jou-chan. I checked everything myself." Sano folded his arms over his chest and looked down at the normally not-so-docile woman, silently demanding an explanation.

Kaoru wriggled under his scrutiny. "Did you check the bath house?"

"Yes."

"The storage shed?"

"Yes."

"The -."

"Kaoru, just tell me what has got you so damned worked up!" Sano demanded with no fear of waking up The Snorer.

Kaoru looked around the kitchen and started a pot of tea, talking as she did so. "When my father had just died, and I was fifteen, someone tried to break-in." When Sano made a distressed noise, she hurried on. "I never found any hard proof, so no one ever believed me, but I know someone was in this dojo. It just really shook me. Been one of my fears ever since."

"You know that with me and Yahiko here you're safe."

"Yes, I know. It's just one of those phobias. If it had happened during the day I would have gone out and checked myself, but something about the night really gives me chills." She shivered despite the hot, moist steam floating up from the water she was neglecting to heat.

Sano moved to stand by her, but didn't say anything for a long while. "I didn't think you feared anything for a long time. Guess I was wrong." He nodded goodnight, then left her alone with her thoughts again.

When a sandalwood scented breeze crawled into the room from under the door, she shivered, and looked down at the now useless pot of lukewarm water. Kaoru set it down and went back to her room, not bothering to put it away.

As she slipped under the thick covers only a minute later, Kaoru scoured her mind, trying to re-glimpse that flash of movement. She used her anxiety to purposefully keep herself awake, until a unique feeling fell over her, seeming to pour over her skin sensuously like honey. Her eyelids fluttered, her hand reached out to touch a specter of imagery, and she fell asleep**.**

_Kaoru's eyes fluttered open in a world too beautiful and mystical to be real. There was a black sky above her and stars glittered like polished diamonds, punctuating the intenseness of the velvety sky around them. She could feel cold, hard ground pressing against her body from underneath, chilling what it could. A small rock was lodged painfully into the small of her back, jolting her to her feet. _

_Around her, the world was even more alluring, infinite in its wonder. Towering trees grew huge in front of her. Their branches were full and leafy, bowing in an erudite manner. Filmy spider webs, delicate as glass, hung like works of art. Strangely though, her eyes felt like they were looking through an __**almost**__ sheer veil. Things were revealed to her, but not completely, their essence saved for another time, another day. _

_Stepping forward, Kaoru found that her limbs felt heavy like they had not only a moment ago. Her fingers were being pulled down by leaden weights, her legs filled with sand, her shoulders heavy with the weight of the world. Only her mind seemed unencumbered. But so opposite was the effect that it spun with the details of the Utopia around her, not allowing her to think or to reason clearly._

_Kaoru slowly made her way toward the forest, terrified and also intrigued by its night-like atmosphere. As she walked, a mist crept up from all sides. It flowed up her body, twined around her ankles, encircled her fingertips. Daintily it dotted her braided hair with bits of dew, gilding the spider webs that lifted magically from her path. Something brushed against her leg, purposely spreading cold to her body. _

_As her head tilted toward the sky, she glimpsed the moon. A perfect circle, glowing in its glorious light. Almost as if on cue, the light filtered around her from in front, pulling her toward an unknown destination. _

_What was happening? Kaoru could feel her body being pulled forward, drawn towards the moon and its will. No matter how she resisted, the feeling continued to tug at her. It was terrifying, inescapable, everywhere. _

_As she drew closer to the center of the forest, the scene around her took a turn towards the bizarre. White hands began to reach out towards her, stretching out at her from all sides. Long, pale fingers __were__ twisting and turning in their need to reach her. When they finally reached close enough to touch her, she was released. _

_The spell that had held her down so forcefully earlier was gone. Vanished so that she was free to run, and escape the grasping fingers drawing closer. Faster and faster she ran, trying repeatedly to veer off course, but unable to. Still the moon pulled her in one direction, and then another, this time forcing her to speed up. Where as before, she had been pulled back and dragged down, now she seemed to have been taken hold of by an errant wind, running faster then she ever had before. _

_Heart pounding, chest heaving, breath rushing. It was exhilarating. And yet there was an edge to that, an apprehension. She was moving too fast to ever hope to control her feet, and the faster she went, the more the chance there was that she would fall. Brought down by gravity till her palms slapped the dirt and her head knocked the earth._

_And yet she did not fall. The thing that urged her on protected her._ _It k__ept her mortal body from crashing. Kaoru was sure that it was aware of her needs, of her unbalanced faults and talents. It was a living, breathing entity with a mind; keen, aware, sharp._

_It was now a constant presence in the air around her, characterized by sharp flashes of red and gold; hard, vicious, but needy. Almost a presence in her mind and totally masculine_. _Demanding, determined that she travel at his pace, but cognizant of the fact that she did not have his abilities. Frustration tinted this entity, seemingly disappointed in its anxiousness to see her. _

_Suddenly, as if the magic had left her whole spirit_,_ she fell. _

_The sickening anticipation of hitting the ground, the unhealthy pleasure of being able to stop running and feeling something solid, surrounded her. But it never came. All she felt for brief seconds was the joyous experience of flight. _

_And then her feet sadly touched the ground, and her eyes opened because with flight came not only the fear of falling but also the ecstasy of freedom. And with landing came the loss of both. Her eyes opened, and they opened wide, to see a man. _

_Though he stood many feet away from her, Kaoru could still see him clearly. His hand was stretched toward her, like he was the thing drawing her forward, welcoming her. His posture was dominant, his stance controlling. He was a samurai. His hair was red as blood. His eyes were pure gold._

And she woke up.

Author's Note - exhales huge breath Glad that's over. Now for the really hard part, YOUR review. It's not hard for you of course, just for me. The waiting game, you know.

Anyway, thanks for reading, I hope you had a fantastic time, and PLEASE read the beginning author's note about updates! All questions and comments can be done via review, or you may email me via the email address that's on my profile page.

Thank you.

Question: what type of music do you like the best?


	2. find

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

Woot! I'm updating on time! Isn't your faith in me growing each month? Well…it should be. Anyway, I was blown away by the number of reviews I got for the first chapter, really, it was wonderful of all you guys to take the time to do that for me. I loved each and every review. And I look forward to more! (hopefully…) Lets just hope that you don't kill me when the cliffhangers start coming around…Anyway, read, and enjoy!

_Historical note: When I said that Kaoru is the same age in the last historical note, I meant that she is the same age that she is in the series. I'm just mentioning this because I know a lot of people thought that she is the same age as Kenshin, who IS younger. Even if Kenshin is younger than in the canon, he is still older than her…in many, as will be revealed._

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta-reader, the __**Kiyomi**__ half of __**Banana Rum**__, and my very first reviewer for this story – __**monya**__. Thanks guys!_

**.:**These**…**Dreams**:.**

**.:**chapter**.**two**.**find**:.**

**Song(s) to Listen to While Reading: **"Dreams" by The Corrs, and "Haunted" by Evanescence.

"_I wanna heal, I wanna feel, What I thought was never real  
__I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long  
__Erase all the pain til' it's gone  
__I wanna heal, I wanna feel, like I'm close to something real  
__I wanna find something I've wanted all along  
__Somewhere I belong." _

-Linkin Park. _Somewhere I belong_.

The next day, Kaoru was in a thoroughly contemplative mood. And while Sano was incredibly sure that he knew why, Yahiko was still in the dark.

That morning, Kaoru traveled to town, intent on efficiently replacing the rice that she had decimated the night before. Later, burden weighing heavily in her arms, Kaoru was free to ponder everything that had happened, whether she wanted to or not. The late night scare. The first break-in. Her father's letter. They all seemed connected, but how? It was like something was probing viciously at the very edges of her conscious that she couldn't quite grasp.

After leaving the rice vendors she absently stepped around a stationary horse and wagon in the crowded street and was unexpectedly shoved to the side. Caught unaware, her burden slipped from her arms as she stumbled into a passerby and warmth traveled between their two bodies.

"I'm very sorry sir." She tried to say, but the words were caught in her throat as the masculine presence from her dreams invaded her mind like a conquering warrior. Then there was the man, the one she had stumbled into. He looked oddly familiar.

He was only a little taller than her, very slight in stature. But she could see the corded strength in his arms as he grasped her heavy purchase. A battered straw hat was pulled low over his face, so his eyes were unclear to her. But one feature was hard to miss. His hair was a glorious red, the color of blood intensified. It hung free down his back, almost waist length. Tiny braids had been artistically inserted into the mass, creating texture and an exotic look. But it certainly did not make him look feminine in the least. Rather, he looked almost travel worn, world wise, weary, but still strong. A warrior to the bone.

"I believe that this is yours." He said, voice firm, but contained.

As Kaoru took the bag back, their fingers brushed; a whisper, a second. But no more was needed. Lightning. Kaoru almost forgot to speak, for in that brief flash, the presence had almost overwhelmed her.

"Thank you." She choked out.

He nodded, but refrained from using his rich voice. But then he looked up. And Kaoru gasped, closed her eyes. She was afraid to see, it was so familiar. From her dream. His eyes too, were gold.

Kaoru rushed home as soon as she could fight her way through the crowd. By the time she got there, her chest was heaving, her legs trembling with the effort it took to not just stand in wonder of what had happened.

After seeing those distinguishing features, Kaoru had opened her eyes to find the man gone. The spot before her already filled by another peasant. Carefully, she had turned her head this way and that, and Kaoru had discerned no hint of bright red anywhere.

Traveling home had taxed her nerves severely. There was a viciousness, a wildness in his eyes that hadn't been translated in her dream; the dream had revealed only frustration and need. Also, in contrast to before, everywhere she had looked seemed to be edged with red, as if he was everywhere with his dramatic hair.

"Sano!" Kaoru called out as she burst in, only to find him sitting against the opposite wall.

The tall man raised an eyebrow at her entrance, but smiled all the same. "Another break-in Jou-chan?"

Kaoru glared at him. "No." she paused, almost unaware of how to explain what had happened. "I saw the man that I dreamed about."

"The perfect man, huh? Didn't think he'd be anywhere near here."

Kaoru's face grew darker with annoyance. "No! The man I dreamed about last night! After you went out to check the yard." Sano just grinned at her defensiveness and drew his lanky body into a standing position. His long legs ate up the floor to the door, "Sano?", but Kaoru caught him just in time. "What do you think about love?"

He frowned. "Why would you be wondering about something like that Jou-chan?"

Kaoru shrugged and gestured vaguely. "I saw someone in the market that just made me think."

Sano shoved his hands into his pockets. "It must be pretty serious then." Kaoru mumbled indecisively and tried to hide her face behind a curtain of hair.

"Anyone I know?" his eyebrows waggled mischievously. Her face turned a bright red and she shook her head frantically. "Apparently not."

"Sano?" she called out again before he could leave.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you. For last night. You really didn't have to go out there."

"Sure I did."

More confused than ever about the market and last night and all the things lying in her memory like mismatched puzzle pieces, Kaoru did something that she rarely did. She went to her father's grave.

Kaoru went _maybe_ once a year. And even when she did go, she despised the sense of melancholy that followed her for the rest of the day. It always managed to hang over her like a black, choking smoke, clogging her thought process. It wasn't a form of disrespect. It was just that even the mere thought of graves and cemeteries and even hospitals was enough to twist her stomach mercilessly into a ball of shivering nerves. She usually preferred to think of him in the place he had lived for, the dojo, or to simply light some incense for him. But this was one of those days where confusion was an even more daunting foe. So she made the journey.

Fog hung thick in the air as she knelt before the stone edifice, head bowed respectfully. Cold droplets hung on her eyelashes and beaded in her hair. She sat there for silent minutes, hoping it wouldn't rain.

"I'm so confused father." She whispered. "I don't know what to do. I know that there was an intruder at the dojo last night. I know there was." Her response was silence.

"I had a strange dream. It was full of white hands. And I…I was running, and I felt like I was about to fall. But I didn't. Something was holding me up." The words slipped from her mouth with difficulty.

"And then I saw a man. I felt like I needed to be with him. But I don't know who he is and I have no idea what to do. Tell me what I should do." Kaoru demanded in a wavering voice, holding back precious tears. As she had expected, there was no answer and she sighed with misplaced disappointment. Kaoru waited for more moments than necessary, knowing she would get no answer when the cold drizzle began to seep through her clothes. She offered a few more prayers for her father's soul, and left.

She sat down hours later on the back porch of the dojo. Soon after she had arrived home, the sky had broken loose and now droplets of water were pounding the earth in a midsummer storm. A cup of hot tea to drive away the cold sat by her side but she did not touch it.

"I don't know what to do." She bemoaned again to the dripping sky. Her words faltered as fog wisped purposefully around her face, tickling the hollow of her throat.

It became steam, hot and moist; she felt it enfolding her bent body. It was almost real, a physical entity pushing her hair to one side and putting its hot, silky mouth on the back of her neck. She shivered violently, and then the presence faded momentarily. But then it grew bolder, and hotter, till she could hardly focus on the gray and bleak yard before her.

Kaoru moaned as it slid down her back and wrapped around her waist underneath her kimono. She felt it trickle between her breasts and curl around her throat. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around herself, feeling the warmth press against her curves.

She did not startle when it ran through every strand of her hair, sliding the thin bow from her black locks. It caressed the tops of her thighs, stretched as they were in her kneeling position. Kaoru let another moan escape her plump lips as the steam delivered an ethereal kiss. She let her whole body relax, not caring that she was in a place where she might be discovered by her living companions and being physically courted by a spirit.

And then someone touched her.

Two firm arms clasped her waist, anchoring her to the person. Their chin came to rest at the junction of her neck and shoulders. Their breath, which tickled the underside of her jaw, was the same as the previous steam. Warm and moist.

Kaoru went very still, all her muscles turning to stone in her captor's arms. She felt him stiffen in return and prayed that he wouldn't move his hands. Kaoru continued to sit there, wanting but not wanting to break the warm circle of their arms.

She felt their tongue dart out to taste her neck and she jerked, gasping at the immediate tightening of their arms. Kaoru swung an arm behind her, connecting solidly with their shoulder. Their hold loosed, but their teeth clamped down on her shoulder, transmitting pain as they bit her. The mouth let go a second before she shot upwards, wishing only to mark her.

Kaoru stumbled forward and looked at where she'd been to see that no one was there. But her neck was aching and she knew it hadn't been an illusion. She felt a sharp, quick pain in her shoulder, then a smooth male voice. "Retribution for my little princess."

Kaoru looked into her hand mirror that night with a pale face. Her nightgown was pulled down to bare one smooth shoulder and her neck. Her eyes were glued to the junction of the two. There were two small pinpricks, already beginning to scab over. She fingered then tentatively, wincing at the slight sting. They were high up, and would be difficult to hide. But perhaps she would just belt her gi a little tighter. Hopefully no one would notice the marks.

The young woman continued to stare at her wan appearance. A momentary flash of light caught her attention, securing it when it reappeared as a dull glow of a dying ember.

There were two eyes, the color of hot amber, smoldering with desire and possession. The eyes were sharp and hard, demanding, but also pleading. They wanted her.

Kaoru spun around, dropping the mirror so that it shattered at her feet. The eyes were gone, and for her troubles, she got several cuts already beginning to bleed.

Sano stuck his head in a few seconds later, but was pushed forward by Yahiko, who also wanted to see what had happened to her. "What broke?" he demanded.

"Just a mirror." Kaoru stated, hurrying to stop Yahiko, who was already starting to pick up the sharp pieces.

He glared at her. "I'm not a kid."

Kaoru returned his glare without hesitation before being shoved aside by Sano, who was impatiently looking at her bare legs. He crouched down to examine them and lifted up one foot, without regard to the fact that doing so would seriously endanger her precarious balance. "You need to get these looked at."

Kaoru teetered unsteadily and pushed his hands aside. "They're not serious. I can clean them. Go to bed."

"Busu-" Yahiko began, stopping when Kaoru returned to glaring at him. "Fine. Fine. If you want to deal with seven years bad luck by yourself, that's fine. But…" his last words were lost as he wandered down the hall with the occasional stomping of his feet.

"Kaoru-"

"I can do it." She snapped, tired with his persistence. "Just bring me a wet rag and some bandages please."

Sano looked at her reproachfully when he returned. He handed her the things, then sat down resolutely on one end of her futon. Seconds ticked by one by one as Kaoru waited for him to leave. Impatiently, she asked, "What?"

He shrugged. "I'm waiting to make sure that you do it right." Kaoru glared at him so that he scrambled to his feet and rushed out the door.

Kaoru sank down to the floor, letting her bones rest for a few moments. Blood was dribbling down her legs from cuts as high up as her knees. Regretfully, she took a wet cloth and dripped water into the wounds. She hissed when they stung, then let out a noise when something cool brushed over each one like sympathizing lips and disappeared.

Her eyes were wild as they scanned the room, but found nothing. She finished the bandaging process efficiently and experienced nothing more.

Kaoru eyed her pillow with suspicion, wondering what spells it would cast on her that night. She patted it hesitantly, and then lay her head down. Pulling the blankets up, she closed her eyes. And nothing happened.

Her eyelids were dark and empty half an hour later. Kaoru waited for a few moments longer, and still, not a thing happened. She screwed her eyes up tightly, and waited.

_Kaoru woke up dazed and confused in the beautiful and perilous dream world. She was not in the same place as before__**,**__ she noted, watching the long and drooping branches of the tree she lay under. The leaves were swaying with the siren call of the wind that did not touch her, twinkling in the bountiful moonlight. Tiny and delicate drops of midnight dew were draped over the branches like the softest of blankets._

_Kaoru sat up to discover that she faced the meadow from her last dream. The grass sparkled as the tree did, but the tree lacked the allure of the voluptuous red flower. _

_It was a gorgeous flower, a passionate, deep red that hinted at subtle undertones of black. The stem was a pure green, bent over from the waterfall-like leaves that fell from its center. Kaoru crawled unsteadily out from under the tree, pushing at the branches that pulled at her hair. The long petals glistened with want for her touch as she walked closer, tempting her pale fingers to caress it; and when she finally reached it, she sighed in pleasure at the first touch of its downy petals. _

_She moved her thumb in a soothing rhythm; back and forth, back and forth. Kaoru hardly noticed when a luscious petal wound itself around her wrist. Pleasant warmth started under her skin as a second did so as well. It traveled up her arm and she imagined herself sitting before a roaring fire. She sighed pleasantly as a hot cup of jasmine tea appeared by the fire in her daydream and steamed up her vision. The fire burned hotter as another petal captured her arm. _

_It was finally getting much too hot for her, and Kaoru yanked her arm, trying to get away from the now searing pain. She cried out as sharp teeth suddenly dug into her arm, and the flower turned from beautiful rapture to torture. She wrenched herself away from the thought of the pleasant fire and stared in horror at the surprisingly cool blue blood flowing from her arm. Kaoru desperately used her other hand to try to pry off the petals, and succeeded in removing one. The others clenched even tighter. She planted her foot on the tender green vine in a last ditch effort and was immediately released. _

_The flower curled pitifully in on itself as Kaoru stared numbly at her arm. There were deep puncture wounds all the way up to her shoulder that still bled. Her wrist was beginning to bruise from the crushing grip and her hair was wild from the struggle. She gave the flower one more wary look and walked cautiously on toward the forest. At least she knew what to expect there. _

_The hands appeared as she had expected. They were still long and white. And she tried to run, but it was like wading through deep water with shackles on. The hands were on her within moments, and instead of destroying her as she was sure they would do, they lifted her up._

_They picked her up in a pinching grip and lifted her up towards the full and gracious moon. She flew high up over the hard ground on the stiff fingers. The pace was even, but the path seemed even longer. _

_The journey seemed everlasting and grew tedious after what felt like hours. But finally it ended, and she was unceremoniously thrown to the ground. It seemed the pale hands had lost their love of her. _

_Kaoru stood up delicately, mindful of the hip she had landed on. She looked about in awe, as the terrain about her was full of craggy rocks and sparse, resilient grass. Here the sun shone proudly, perhaps to spite the moon. _

_The towering landscape was like nothing she had ever seen. Shading her eyes with one __hand,__ she looked out as far as she could see and caught a glimpse of red, high atop the farthest rock. She was sure it was the man from her previous dream, the man from the market, the voice from the back porch; the one that enticed her. And it seemed to be beckoning to her. _

_She started out determinedly, for she was going to get to that man. She scrambled over low hills, pulled herself over ridges, and tripped repeatedly over hidden perils. But she kept on going. Nothing would deter her because she, Kamiya Kaoru, would get to the bottom of the intrigue surrounding her. _

_Her breath came in pants, hard and fast, as she stood in front of the last rock and stared up. All she had left to do was climb up it, and that in itself was a daunting task. It was even more so as her legs were shaking, her fingers bloody, her chest heaving, and her arm weak from the deceitful flower. Kaoru was exhausted, but still she put one foot into a tiny crevice. And as she was about to hoist herself up, a slight hiss reached her ears. Fearing that something was on the wall with her, she let go abruptly and fell back with a thump. The snake was right in front of her. _

_It was not the largest snake she had ever heard tell of, but it was still large. The slick scales formed a faint pattern on its thin and twisting back. She gasped when it opened its mouth wide, but was relieved to see no fangs. Its mouth closed again and it slithered closer to her. The first touch of its scales on her skin was icy, and she realized why it was advancing on her. The trees of the forest had grown so large that they even overshadowed the rocks at this far end of the course, blocking out all sunlight and heat. The poor thing was freezing, and she knew it wouldn't hurt her. By the gleam in its eyes, Kaoru knew it would have already hurt her if it had planned to do so._

_She let it slither up her arm stiffly, but it didn't stop there. Kaoru gasped as it slid over her back, ultimately sliding down to encircle her waist and drape itself around her neck in another dangerous embrace. _

_Kaoru stood up carefully, staggering with the extra weight. Her already worn out body struggled to pull the weight up to the top. Her fingers dug almost uselessly into the hard rock and she almost slipped several times. But the close calls refused to scare her. She knew in her mind that this was a dream. If she was hurt in a dream, there would still be no effect in the waking world. _

_Finally, after immense struggle, she heaved herself over the edge of the hard rock, careful of the snake still clinging to her for her warmth. _

_Breathing even harder than before, she leaned onto her knees for support, but soon stood up in startled wonder. She grasped her waist and looked about in amazement, for the snake had disappeared. _

_It was only then that she noticed one thing. _

_Instead of a person with blazing hair, there stood a katana, firmly stuck in the ground, a red ribbon tied to the hilt. She spun around when the same voice as before whispered, "A gift koishii…"_

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Okay, well, that's the second chapter and I hope that you all loved it. I'll be updating next month with the third chapter. Yay! Perhaps then my dream reviewers, **Ravyn** and **JaneDrew** will review!! (Hopefully…yeah right…)

Thanks again to my reviewers – you're all wonderful – **monya**, **GranolaBar**, **BnK**, **kokoronagomu**, **umeboshi-girl**, **Winter**, **abubi-chan**, **sulou**, **midnightblue123**, **Paramecio**, **JMai**, **happyloveygirl** (I'm glad you smiled!), **Scarletpagan** (I'm so flattered!), **blossompetals**, **Kairi16**, **Arydis**, **smfan**, **Reignashii**, and **truthfulies**.

LAST WEEK'S SURVEY: What type of music do you like the best?

RESULTS:

Muse – 1  
Rock – 2  
Punk - 1  
Garbage – 1  
J-Pop – 3  
J-Rock – 2  
J-R&B - 1  
Trad. Japaanese - 1  
Trad. Celtic – 1  
Hard Irish Punk – 1  
Folk – 1  
Soundtrack – 1  
Classical Music – 2  
Movin' & Grovin' Music – 1 (hee hee)THIS WEEK'S SURVERY: Your favorite type of soda? (OH – its ON between us Coke Cola people and you Pepsi heathens!) 


	3. save

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

Okay guys, I am updating EARLY! (And there is a reason for this madness!) I'm going on vacation later today, so I'll be gone way past the first of August. I'd rather my update be early instead of late. Don't you guys love me for that? Well, here is the third chapter of "These Dreams". And Kenshin does appear in her dream. He doesn't enter the real world until the end of chapter four. ENJOY!

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta reader, the __**Kiyomi **__half of __**Banana Rum**__ and to __**Onhiro**__ and __**Reignashii**__ for loving Diet Coke so much. __**Aly the Trickster**__…man, I don't tolerate haters around my house…instead of totally bashing Coke AND Pepsi, just say that you like another type of soda. It was that simple dude…_

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
****.:**chapter**.**three**.save:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading:  
_"_1001 Nights (From the Nutcracker Suite)" by OperaBabes  
_"_Haunted" by Evanescence _

"I am the daughter of Earth and Water,  
and the nursling of the Sky;  
I pass throughout the pores of the ocean and shores;  
I change, but I cannot die.  
For after the rain when with never a stain  
The pavilion of Heaven is bare,  
And the wind and sunbeams with their convex gleams  
Build up the blue domes of air,  
I silently laugh at my own cenotaph,  
And out of the caverns of rain  
Like a child from the womb, like a ghost from the tomb,  
I arise and unbuild it again."  
-P.B. Shelley

Kaoru loved to relax, especially at the Akabeko. The Akabeko was a place that was consistently full of well-controlled chaos, but even then she could sit undisturbed in the middle of it all and observe at her leisure. And this visit was especially relaxing to her, as the past few days had been confusing to say the least.

One could also call it exciting, mysterious, maybe even arousing… But whatever the word for it was, it was nice to escape the whole thing, even if only for a few hours.

Kaoru smiled cheerfully at Tae as she passed, grateful for the hot and replenishing meal she had provided; then stiffened quickly. There was a sudden feeling of being watched, again. And with this came the feeling of being trapped within the web of someone's gaze. Her limbs felt cold and as if they had been secured in a spider's trap. She began to feel tired enough to cry; exhausted as she was from the past few nights of very little sleep and it was beginning to affect her. She just wanted to be alone; to feel safe; to feel as if her thoughts were her own and no one else's.

As if sensing her distress, the hidden eyes revealed themselves in the voice that continued to haunt her. "Do not cry koishii…I enjoy watching you, yet your tears render me useless. Be happy, for we will be together soon…" Kaoru's body turned to ice as the words floated about her head like smoke.

Tae stopped in her second circuit to look worriedly at her friend when she meant to pass by. She hesitated to sit down but ultimately did so, scaring Kaoru a she did. Her eyes took in Kaoru's battered form: the scratches, the bruises, and the tightly bandaged arm. "What has happened to you Kaoru?" she questioned. "I've never seen you like this before."

Kaoru looked somewhat nervous. "Some strange things have been happening to me Tae. I don't know what is going on."

Tae placed a comforting hand on the uninjured arm. "You can tell me."

"I don't know…"

"Please Kaoru. You know I won't tell a soul."

The younger woman leaned forward as she looked up. "I've been…having these dreams Tae. And in the beginning I always have to go through this journey. I always have to travel somewhere. And this strange man is always there too." She hesitated. "I get hurt during these dreams as well, because I'm always chasing this man; and when I wake up, I still have the wounds."

She pointed to her other arm and then grasped her friend's hand. "And Tae, this man is real. I've seen him in the marketplace right outside. Touched him. He's real. And he watches me." Her voice shook. "I can feel it…"

Tae thought for a moment, digesting the strange tale just given to her. Kaoru would never make up something like this**,** and her wounds certainly didn't lie. "What does this man look like? Perhaps I too, have seen him." She suggested.

"Red, red hair, like spilled blood. And his eyes…" she struggled ineffectively to find the right words. "His eyes are like gold, but much… better." She finished unenthusiastically.

Tae knew suddenly and unequivocally who she was talking about. And that person scared her like no other with bone chilling accuracy. "I think that perhaps you should be more careful from now on Kaoru."

Kaoru walked home warily, staying to the side of the road where she could watch the passersby. Other travelers called out to her, but she only gave them lackluster responses in return as her mind was otherwise occupied. All the while, the feeling of being watched persisted, and still no flash of red reached her eyes, though she told herself multiple times that there was no real reason for her to see any red such as that she was looking for…

Entering the dojo provided little relief. When she was in her room, the voice and whoever it belonged to seemed to be right beside her. But outside of her room, there were moments of peace before she was found again. It seemed as if they were connected; it _felt _like they were melded through their souls and that she'd never escape him.

She was so distracted and excitable that even Yahiko, who had no idea what had happened not so long ago, noticed. Sano caught her tea cup when she accidentally dropped it at an unexpected noise and frowned. "Something the matter Kaoru?"

"No." she snapped. "I'm just tired."

Sano frowned again and spoke as if comforting a nervous filly. "Easy Jou-chan. I'm just trying to figure out what has you so off. What isn't good for you must really be bad for us."

Kaoru sighed and put her head in her hands momentarily. "I know Sano and I'm sorry. I'm just having these awful dreams." She felt a sting of pain at the word 'awful', and fought to keep still as the voice sounded like a bell throughout her head. 'You think me awful?' it asked.

"Like nightmares?" Sano questioned.

"Not exactly." She just couldn't find the right words to explain.

Luckily, it didn't seem like she needed to find them. "Hmmm…" he thought for a moment. "I know what you mean. But I also know a cure for this ailment. Go practice in the forest Jou-chan, completely alone. It's very relaxing." He smiled winningly. "And I should know 'cause I'm always right, huh?"

Kaoru punched his arm in jest. "I'd tell you that that's the best idea you've ever come up with and that I just might do it, but it might make your head swell up so that you won't be able to get through the door at all." Sano looked appropriately heartbroken at her blatant statement.

So she gathered up all the accoutrements of her trade and walked out under a deep green canopy of rich leaves. A feeling of complete calm fell over her as the thick leaves overhead shielded her slightly from the invisible eyes. Her footsteps were steady and her hands fluttery as she walked, surrounded by nature as she was. This was her first deliberate attempt to actually escape the demon that followed her**;** she had no idea what would happen.

She could feel her fear melt away into a pool of apprehension as she kept on walking and still nothing happened. The birds chattered and the dappled sunlight was cheery, and surely that meant there were no menacing presences lurking about. Her steps became surer as the path twisted and turned and lead down a steep hill. Then just as she was ready to believe that she was finally alone, her shield was ripped to shreds, and the voice floated down from the trees like a forlorn love letter. 'You will never be without me Kaoru…I am always with you…'

Kaoru screeched as her foot landed on an unsteady pebble and she tumbled down the hill, landing at the bottom after a few long, painful seconds. She groaned, tears falling down her cheeks as a torrent of fierce anger burned through her body. She scrambled to her feet and stared up at the sky, the sun glinting off her tears and highlighting her figure.

"Stop it!" Kaoru screamed haphazardly in a hoarse voice, twisting her hands about and whirling around to view every inch of the world in her immediate vicinity. "Just stop it! Leave me alone! Stop hurting me!" The frightful sound echoed off all the nearby trees and a flock of birds took flight. "Stop it!"

There was nothing. No sound, no movement for a long time. But most importantly, she truly felt alone. Surprisingly, as she felt this, a deep emptiness entered her body, and what unrepeatable feelings she felt then huddled in a hard ball near her heart.

Ashamedly she wiped away her tears and hurried on, soon entering a small glade surrounded by a wealth of ancient trees. There was a waterfall that fell like ice-glazed silk to a deep pool and large rocks that sat at the edges and basked in the sun like lizards in the summer. Kaoru sighed contentedly.

This was peace.

She was careful to keep her mind focused as she practiced. The only blunder was at the very beginning when amber eyes had flashed through her head and she had fallen. But this was her fault, as she had been the one to bring up such a picture.

Her skin was covered in sticky and unpleasant sweat when she was finally exhausted hours later. Kaoru looked down at herself in disgust as she sat down on the grass. She just knew that her hair was absolutely everywhere, and it was sticking to the back of her neck like a lie she just couldn't shake. There was dirt on her hands and arms, her gi was also had a film of dirt, and her hakama had been graced with grass stains.

Kaoru looked about carefully, then looked at the waterfall and pool. She had never been interrupted here, and the water looked so inviting. What were the odds that she'd get interrupted on this particular day? Very little she decided.

She stripped off her clothes hurriedly, her fingers fumbling at the little ties. Her bokken sat against one of the rocks**, **and she peeled off her footwear and let them lay dejectedly to the side. She stood on one of the large rocks and looked down at the water with widened eyes before jumping in with a wild war cry. The water was cold and ran over her skin as the wind did leaves.

The pool was surprisingly deep as she swam about, deeper than she remembered it to be. She surfaced sputtering good–naturedly and wiping errant strands of hair out of her eyes. Small waves splashed against her and the sheer feeling of joy, a sharp contrast to earlier, made her laugh out loud.

Daringly, Kaoru climbed out of the pool to the waterfall, which hit her back sharply for a moment before she was past it and into a little cave that burrowed into the rock only a few feet. Her legs were hit with hard little droplets and her hands pushed back her hair. She took a deep, steadying breath and jumped out, through the water.

The falling liquid was like glass on her body as she burst through it; Kaoru hit the pool forcefully and it embraced her. She watched the glass-like bubbles float to the surface bemusedly. Her eyes followed the glitter, the sparkle of sun on the water lazily. They switched all too easily to the fist-sized ball of light, one which bobbed and weaved as a craft did upon the sea.

She smiled with her lips, letting herself sink downward until her eyelids began to drift down and she began to feel her mind wander. Seconds dragged like minutes as the sunlight that filtered through the water began to appear hazy and it was suddenly hard for her to move.

The bandages on her legs and her arm soon unraveled and fell below her while she continued to fall into that trance. That sleep that brought her to the dream world. She yawned in the water and let herself surrender the trance-like pull.

Her vision flickered like the flame of a candle as she first opened her eyes. There was a curiously loud crashing sound that was close to her head and water was lapping at her limbs and pulling at her feet; her body was pressed against soft and damp ground. Kaoru stood up unsteadily and looked about with shaded eyes.

_An ocean lay before her, the dark water rising up and falling in a pattern older than time. In places far out to sea she glimpsed flashes of a tail, the glitter of an eye, and the scent of a prey's blood. The moon stood within a bright sky and the light was just as it would be at twilight. She turned about and discovered the sun in the opposite direction, sitting negligently across from the radiant moon. They reminded her of warriors facing each other in a battle, each standing to one end of a watery clearing, swords drawn and bodies poised but refusing to move._

_She looked down at herself for the first time as she felt cloth brush her ankle in a slight breeze. Her sight first came upon her legs and her arms, which were once again unblemished and smooth. She noticed next that she was wearing a filmy shift that clung damply to her form and was littered with sand on the front. It stopped at her knee__**, **__and bared her shoulders and arms in a sophisticated show of seduction._

_The young woman bent down to the sand when she noted small round objects that glinted in the mix of moon and sun. They rolled about her palm easily and were tiny and beautiful pearls. Delicate and smooth, they were about as wide as her smallest finger and perfectly round, as if they were their own little worlds. Kaoru smiled in delight she picked up more and more, tucking them into the pocket of her fragile shift._

_Kaoru looked upon her bare feet when she stood up and then let her eyes travel down the beach. She noticed a set of footsteps weaving along the beach and followed them, watching as the waves sloshed over them till there was nothing left. Still she kept walking as they had shown her, the beach having no end in sight._

_She stopped when a shadow apprehended her, like mud falling over the beach and herself. Her eyes widened when she looked up and she had a hard time taking in the numerous arms. Its tentacles reached high up above the tumultuous waters and then flung themselves upon the beach in a search for her. Kaoru screamed when one large limb plowed into her, wrapping about her body as it did._

_Her body jerked as she flung herself toward the sand, grasping at it ineffectively as she was dragged toward the water that needed her. The deep furrows she had made became her last image as they filled with water and she was pulled under. The waves washed over her body and also attempted to pull her in, trying to pull her to darker depths than the monster would want to. She braced herself for the horrendous pain of many sharp teeth digging into her flesh but felt only rough coral abrading her skin. She dared not test her eyes and open them to the salty water, but she was delighted to find that her body had no need of oxygen._

_Although her eyes were closed, Kaoru could still feel many things. The sucking and grasping tentacles. The tender brush of seaweed on her limbs. The scratch of rough scales. The sharp nip of curious fish. The ominous stare of large animals that she had no wish to meet._

_She did open her eyes when her captor slowed to a grinding stop and released her to float within the confining arms of the ocean. The wide ocean floor was littered with rotting vegetation and bottom feeders who slunk about looking for meals. Bits of algae floated around her head and stuck to her hair. Intimidating gray sharks swished about underneath her feet and little fish darted around her with great curiosity, stopping to stare at whatever caught their fancy._

_The ocean then seemed to reach within, sucking out the air she relied on with brutal force. She felt tears well up in her eyes even as she struggled to breathe._

_There was no other human being around her till without warning she was ringed by golden eyed men who were carbon copies of the one who haunted her. As they surrounded her they each reached out one hand as if to take her own and she felt her throat close up and what little breath was left flew from her lungs. In each of their eyes was a different piece of history, a different emotion._

_In one pair of eyes she glimpsed blood falling as if it were rain and a shame that felt bone deep. She saw her own father, lying prone on the ground and there was a glimpse of a photograph of a younger her in the second pair of eyes. Another sheltered the tender and underdeveloped ability to love and the story of how it had been neglected__**,**__ while the one next to it revealed herself and his feelings for her. As she twisted about she caught the eye of one who brought with it the strength it had taken her follower to even live. Her lungs froze as she met the next pair of eyes, ones that offered up such a violence and hatred that her own heart felt as if it should shrivel and blacken._

_Kaoru met the last pair of eyes with something akin to desperation. Bubbles seemed to float up from her skin as if the little air that was left was leaking from her and she felt real fear stretch like a cat in her stomach. She was sure that her face was turning blue but that no longer seemed to matter when those eyes stared back. There was only him. A complete man who was scarred and beaten but who also stood with the weight of many people upon his shoulders and radiated love for the one person truly in his heart. _

_So in that moment she knew him. Knew everything about him. He loved her. He was becoming apart of her. She was already a part of him. There would be no turning from him. No escaping and no time for her to be away from him. He would be everywhere, just as he had said._

_Her lungs felt like they were burning when his lips touched hers, perhaps with the breath of life. They were hot, but also soft as they caressed her own lips, which were cold from the water about her. She let him wrap his arms around her in an embrace sweeter than the ocean's had been and sighed into his kiss._

_He was tender and loving and not at all what she would have expected from a man whose eyes shouted passion._

_He brought her into his world and life till at that moment there was only one instead of two._

_He caressed her skin till she wished to writhe against him._

_He showered her with unrequited affection and he kissed her like a dying man did his last salvation._

_He let her go with forlorn eyes and whispered, "Free me and I will never leave you…"_

_She was cold and alone as she drifted away and let his name fall from her dream lips, "Kenshin."_

Kaoru woke up on the small sandy beach of the deep pool. She was lying naked on her side with her hands pillowing her cheek and her legs folded up. She discovered as she sat up that threaded into her hair were tiny pearls that were delicate and smooth; perfectly round as if they were their own little worlds…

AUTHOR'S NOTE – Okay, so my dream reviewers denied me once more…but I can live with that. You want to know why? Because I got so many awesome reviews from you guys!

Thanks again to all my reviewers – **Celestial Raven, BnK (**OMG –Thanks!), **kokoronagomu, tcl7189, happyloveygirl, Scarletpagan,** **Fae, midnightblue123, Onhiro, Aly the Trickster (**I just noticed, almost your entire review was about hating Coke…with one line about my story.),** Reignashii, Nagasasu, Eve, truthfulies, Rebeckah, Leigh4, **and **LadyNorth76.**

LAST MONTH'S POLL: Your favorite type of soda.

RESULTS:

Coca Cola – 4 (Number of unofficial Chelsea votes – 7,892,634)  
Water – 1  
Ramune – 1  
Sierra Mist – 1  
Ginger Ale – 1  
Root Beer – 1  
Melon Soda - 1  
Calpis – 1  
Mountain Dew – 1 (I just had one of the new flavors and it was really good! I felt like I could make a Hawaiian Ice cone out of it.)  
Pepsi – 0 (laughing my head off!)

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Diet Coke triumphs! Booyah!

NEXT MONTH'S POLL: Do you speak a language other than English fluently? Which one? Me – I speak French.


	4. haunted by salvation

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

Did you miss me? And yes, my vacation was awesome! I saw "The Dark Knight" THREE times! I love that movie, it is just so great! Unfortunately, school started up and now its back to the daily grind. But never fear my gentle readers! Since this story has already been finished, updates will always be on time!

_As always this chapter is dedicated to my made-of-awesome Beta Reader, the __**Kiyomi**__ half of __**Banana Rum**__, my absolutely wonderful reviewer __**BnK**__, and to my friend __**Julianne B**__., for making me go on the Double Shot at the Boardwalk even though I was scared and then laughing at me when I screamed. Thanks a lot for that. A lot._

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
****.:**chapter**.**four**.haunted.by.salvation:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading:  
_"_Haunted" by Evanescence  
_"_Learn to be Lonely" by Andrew Lloyd Webber_

"Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,  
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;  
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,  
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Lenore?"  
This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, "Lenore!" --  
Merely this and nothing more."

-Edgar Allan Poe, "The Raven"

Kaoru was very unhappy. Her arm was aching, her legs hurt, and her black eye was throbbing. She was also preoccupied. Last night she had woken up with terror-stricken eyes and glanced around, as if expecting a terrible monster to show its vile face in her darkened room. She had lain awake till the morning, when the sun had begun creeping into the sky like a spider on its web.

Being thrown over Sano's shoulder and guarded by a bored Yahiko didn't help either.

"How you doing back there Jou-chan?" Sano called to the woman bouncing on his shoulder. Kaoru grumbled and smacked him on the back again with a resounding 'thwack'.

There was a supreme sense of satisfaction as she did so and it was not entirely her own. When she had been hoisted up over her surrogate brother's shoulder there had been an intoxicating rush of dark anger and jealousy and possessiveness. In fact, it was so over whelming that even Sano had sensed it and had shivered accordingly. Kaoru could still detect it hovering at the edges of her consciousness.

She was still letting it deep into her skin that she knew Kenshin in an entirely intimate and possessive way. How was it possible for her to share emotions with someone she'd never actually met? And still she felt his pain within herself and identified with him. Her lips still remembered the feel of his lips from her dream and the emotions that they had transmitted to her. Most importantly, she felt his love for her alone as if it was a leech that had latched onto the skin above her heart and refused to let go.

And his love was gradually becoming necessary to her…

It was then that she realized that she did know this man named Kenshin. She knew the essential principles of his soul so well that they were the very air she breathed and every moment she could recount of him shimmered as a jewel within her mind.

His pleasure at these thoughts was palpable and words of possession and love ghosted across her skin.

Kaoru was shaken from the firm hold of her thoughts when Sano set her down outside of the clinic run by Dr. Genzai. Earlier that morning Sano had insisted that she get her wounds checked and had refused to listen when she had told him she wouldn't go. Kaoru's reasoning was simple: she had no wish and no way to explain the injuries she had sustained. Frustrated at her refusal to cooperate and her lack of regard for her own health, Sano had hoisted her up and started on his way.

'_Please be attended by this doctor Koishi. I ask this favor of you personally.'_ This man, Kenshin, she reminded herself, said within her mind as she dug her heels into the ground in front of the clinic. Kaoru looked to the sky and then relented with a sigh. It was, in truth, the only thing he had ever actually asked her to do…

"I'd rather you not herd me in there Sagara. Especially after you treated me like a child." She wrenched her arm away and walked up to the steps.

He followed her till they stood on the porch. "It's for your own good Jou-chan. Those have to be looked at by a doctor. You wouldn't want then to get infected, would you?"

Kaoru spun around. "Stop that!"

"Stop what?" he asked innocently.

"Stop speaking to me as if I'm five years old Sano. That time is long past!"

"If you act like a child then I have the right to speak to you like a child."

Kaoru's cheeks turned a dull and tempestuous red. "What have I done that's childish?" she snapped.

It was then that Dr. Genzai appeared. The gray haired man sported a nervous smile on his face and hastily separated them. "Now, now, surely it isn't so important that you argue about it." Both Kaoru and Sano looked down, as it was bad enough to argue. But to be chided by the mild and good-natured Dr. Genzai…

"I just thought that you of all people would realize the importance of keeping away infection." Sano said quietly when Dr. Genzai moved ahead, referring to her father. Louder, he added, "Yahiko, you can stay out here if you want."

Yahiko shot them a sour look as they disappeared into the clinic. He had only accompanied them because Sano had promised him a trip to the market, where Tsubame, Yahiko's long-time crush, worked. He hadn't been aware that they'd be making a small side trip to the clinic.

Dr. Genzai reappeared then with a tender smile on his weathered face. "It seems," he started as he led them to an examination room, "that Ayame and Suzume found out that you had arrived and started some tea. That will be a nice end to this visit, won't it?" He smiled again, and Kaoru could tell he was still trying to put some distance between her and Sano.

The room they were led to was small but clean, with a table and a couple of chairs on one side and a beautiful wooden cabinet on the other. But instead of beginning the examination, Dr. Genzai seated her and then sat down opposite her with a concerned look on his face. Kaoru shot Sano, who stood leaning on the door, a confused look.

"Kaoru, Sano and I are very worried about you," said the doctor. "I've been told that you've got several wounds that have no reasonable explanation."

Kaoru frowned, unsure as to what this was about. "I don't understand."

Dr. Genzai leaned forward eagerly. "Kaoru, we are concerned that you are purposefully inflicting these wounds upon yourself." Kaoru sputtered angrily as she looked back and forth between the two other people in the room. "We need you to understand that this it not healthy and that you must seek help immediately."

Needless to say, Kaoru immediately went about setting them straight about such issues. "How can you think that I would hurt myself? What sane person would do so? Is that it – do you think I'm insane?" she demanded. Dr. Genzai winced because with each word her voice rose in volume and fury.

"Furthermore, you can just take your assumptions and go-"

"Kaoru!" Sano interrupted, pulling her out of the poor doctor's face. "Maybe you should calm down."

She gave him a look that promised retribution. "Calm down? You want me to calm down? Then never set foot on my property ever again."

Sano laughed nervously. "You don't mean that Jou-chan." He took her by the shoulders and led her out the door and into the hall. Perhaps going to the market and buying something pretty would improve her temper. He would even pay for it himself if that was what it came to…

"Kaoru, come on!" Sano called out as he rushed after Kaoru.

Yahiko also dodged people in the market place, trying to catch up with Kaoru. He had heard what had gone on by putting his ear to the door and listening in. Even though he had also heard Kaoru's thorough explanation as to why she was not cutting herself, even the mere thought that someone as strong as Kaoru would do such a thing made him frantic. "Busu! Wait up!" he yelled.

Kaoru did not listen to either of them. She was furious. No – beyond furious that they would think such a thing of her. She could not believe-

Her thoughts were interrupted when she collided with someone else. Both parties raised their down turned heads to see who they had hit and the stranger smiled. Kaoru backed up respectfully; the woman standing before her was even shorter than her, but she was dressed in rich fabrics and was covered in articles of clothing that probably cost more than Kaoru made in a month. She looked too young to posses such wealth too, for her skin was smooth and her posture straight. "I'm sorry." Kaoru said, backing up even more to go around.

The woman stopped her, smiling even more. "Don't worry about it. Since you'll be one of us soon, I don't mind."

Kaoru stopped, frowning again as Sano and Yahiko drew up behind her. "What do you-"

"This is my husband." Stated the woman as a man came to stand at her side. He was extremely tall for a Japanese man and his eyes were a beautiful icy blue. He studied her through oil black bangs and said nothing. "I am Misao and this is Aoshi." She gestured to the man.

"One of you? What do you mean one of you?" Kaoru asked nervously, noting that expensive clothes also graced the man, Aoshi.

"I'll see you another time Kaoru." Misao brushed past and Aoshi followed, dipping his head in farewell. Kaoru and Sano and Yahiko watched in puzzlement as they drifted away into the crowd.

Sano grabbed her arm to make sure she didn't run off again. "Do you know them?"

Kaoru shrugged, stepping aside to let a merchant and his wares pass by. "No. I didn't even tell her my name."

She stood there for a moment, and then turned on her companions. "How could you tell Dr. Genzai that you thought I was trying to kill myself?" she growled.

"Can you blame me Jou-chan? You suddenly had all these injuries and I just thought…"

"Can I blame you? Of course I can blame you!" she rounded on Yahiko. "And what about you? What part did you have in this?"

Yahiko backed up. "Calm down Busu. I just listened through the door. Honest."

"You were eavesdropping?" Sano demanded sharply.

"Oh! Don't suddenly act so pure as snow! You accused me of attempted suicide!" Kaoru scowled fiercely at them both, and then shielded her eyes by putting one hand up to her brow. "I need to go to sleep. You two are giving me a headache that could wipe out Kyoto." Sano grinned and promptly escorted her back to the dojo.

_Kaoru's eyes opened and expected to immediately be greeted by the natural haven they had become accustomed to. As she blinked sleep out of her eyes and saw only an unfamiliar place, she felt the darkness inject panic into her iced veins. _

_Her eyes adjusted to the strange light slowly, as it revealed some spaces, yet disguised others. Kaoru gazed at the room that contained her in unconcealed horror. A dungeon held her body and soul within its malicious grasp. A dungeon that clung to the word "habitable" only by a string. Dirt padded the stone floor beneath her outspread body, though she could still feel the hard edges of stones that pressed between her shoulder blades and into her spine. The stone walls were dusty, and so tall that she failed to see where they ended. She was, however, able to make out the scratches that had been left upon them by the teeth and nails of men desperate to be free. _

_She stood up on shaking legs and stumbled drunkenly to one corner where a yellow, viscous liquid had frozen over. And next to it lay a rough wooden bench aged by insurmountable time and broken to splinters by a spirit consumed with rage. There was a steady dripping sound and she followed her ears to it, hoping for a source of fresh water. To her disgust and fright she found it: the freshly slaughtered corpse of a cat-sized rat. A metal bar that protruded from the wall also pierced its body and its yellow eyes focused on her sightlessly. She cried out as another furry body trampled her foot and she scrambled back, pressing herself to the wall made of metal bars. _

_Kaoru turned to grasp the bars in aching, white hands and looked out desperately, though she saw nothing. A fleeting glimpse of light caught the corner of her eye and she searched for it again, pleading silently for it to be perhaps a clue to the way out. It flashed again, this time a comforting red, and she was drawn to it as if a moth to flame. _

_One long strand of blood colored hair. _

_It hung limply from the metal bars and Kaoru picked it up carefully. The hair felt like blessed silk in contrast to the environment around her. _

_As she held it close to her heart as if it were the flesh and blood person she suddenly craved, invisible hands pushed her forward through the wall that instantly did not seem to exist. Kaoru stumbled and fell to the unforgiving ground. She picked herself up carefully and looked about in astonishment. More cells materialized on both sides of the path she stood on and her own now held a new occupant, a strange being she did not recognize. It moaned pitifully and held out one gnarled hand. She wondered it if had been with her the whole time. _

_Kaoru backed slowly away from the hand that dripped with desperation and compressed her body against the opposite cell. Its occupant screamed a mixture of delight and anger. It pulled her tighter against the bars, locking its grimy hands around her throat. She struggled with the thing for long moments, screaming and kicking and cursing till she was let up. Her eyes stayed glued to the monster as she felt her tender and ripped throat with shaking hands. _

_It jeered at her as she walked away, toward the door at the end of the path that she felt was the way out of the place. As she did, she had no recourse but to study the abhorrent chimeras that had settled within the gloom of each stone and metal pen. They were misshapen and gross, some missing limbs while others had spares. They also cried out and reached toward her trembling from as she listed past them. Only a limited few of them, invisible to her in the darkness but for their red eyes, never made a sound, choosing to watch her as she passed and it was their silences that disturbed her the most. _

_Kaoru finally reached the door of wood that bared her way to freedom with a sense of deep relief. She looked about for and item that would open it with something akin to distraught. She saw nothing. _

"_I have the key little girl." A gravelly and patronizing voice called to her. _

"_Come take the key from me, little one…" it said as two green eyes loomed from the unknown. Kaoru found her legs and feet moving forward, towards the cage, though she knew such a thing was not wise. _

"_That's right pretty girl. Take this key from me…It is useless to as wretched a monster as me." The voice slithered through the metal bars to pull her to it against the wishes of her mind. _

_She found herself moving forward in a trance, closer and closer to the cell till it began to ensnare her mind too. Its image became distorted, odd, the features sliding across a wax face before settling again. The eyes gathered a body – a handsome man. Tall and broad shouldered with the blonde hair of a westerner. He became fair mannered and kind, the voice transforming from gravelly to smooth and comforting as she listened. _

_Her hands reached forward and her fingertips stretched till they brushed the frigid metal. She noted a black covered hand floating toward her…_

"_No koishii! Do not touch him!" Her Kenshin's voice screamed, screeching within her body and soul, wrenching her hand back just as the vile chimera snatched at her. _

_Kaoru stared in terror at the monster who had nearly ensnared her. The lips were too long for its mouth and they were severely lopsided. Its eyes were large in the extreme and made the flattened nose look dwarfed. Its skin was rough and scarred and one of its ears was missing. A disturbing monster. _

_It laughed, humor dripping from its eyes and mocking her hungry fear. It threw its head back as the depreciating sound roared from within. Kaoru scowled at it for the trickery it had temporarily placed upon her and its laughter increased in volume. When the nightmarish creature finally quieted down, it rubbed its bulbous stomach and spoke. "So my little pretty one, you've regained your senses. But do you still see what you want to see, or do you see me as I am now?"_

_Kaoru ran the words of her would-be assailant over and over through her clouded head as she studied the door that blocked her path. She ran her hands over one side of the varnished oak panel, aware of the monster's eyes upon her still. Her fingers smoothed over the very top edge of the door; they followed the curve of the door, sliding down the side, stopping only at something odd. _

_A small niche within the side of the door. Kaoru smiled joyfully pressing her finger into it and startling when the watchful creature chuckled. "I have not seen such a smile in many years." It stated. She ignored the words and continued to study the unusual marking. _

_She pressed her thumb into the unnatural groove using the weight of her entire body for effect. Every atom of her being was flooded almost immediately with humiliation and disappointment when nothing happened. In desperation she tried again, grunting softly in effort and masked anger. 'Why isn't this moving?' She groaned furiously, giving the distinct impression of a bull whose black and gleaming eyes had caught sight of red. _

'_Patience koishii…you're almost there. You almost have it…' It seemed his voice held her disappointment too. But even more than that, it pressed upon her shoulders the hope he held close that she would escape and find him. _

_Kaoru's head snapped to the side as her tormentor let out a great guffaw, clutching his belly in pure mirth. "You'll never get out that way pretty girl." It teased and tantalized. The thing took in her anger and chuckled, tears slinking down its leathery cheeks from its oversized eyes. _

_Her eyes narrowed to small slits, studying it in angry suspicion. Her blue eyes caught the small movements of its hands as the great octopus had caught her up in the last dream. The quick and sharp moves, with its painfully swelled knuckles cracking periodically, mesmerized her. She was sure that there was something to it. There was a clue there that somehow was eluding the bright steel trap of her mind. _

_Back and forth. Back and forth. Pushing something. Moving something to the side. To the side…_

"_What are you looking at pretty girl?" demanded the creature's voice, slithering around the metal bars, trying to bespell her again. She watched as a mask of calm slid down over its previously gleeful features as gates did in an iron fortress. _

"_Your hands…" Kaoru whispered dazedly, watching the hands suddenly become motionless and stiff. She unconsciously mimicked its movements, over and over again, till her hands guided themselves to the door and did so again. _

_The creature cried out, an exclamation of surprise and self-directed anger and the door began to change. It howled as the door revealed itself to Kaoru's widening eyes, shedding the illusion of wood for the image of stone. She too, cried out in surprise as the door shifted slowly to the side. She backed away as it slid into the wall with a groan of disuse. _

_She felt Kenshin's exultation mingle with her own at the sight of the door space. Felt his insistence that she move, and so she surged forward in compliance, just slipping through before it closed abruptly with a thud. A scream of rage dimly trickled into her ears from the other side of the thick wall, convincing her that she really did not want to be back there and that forward was the right direction. _

_Kaoru turned to face the next segment of her dream with apprehension apparent in every line of her body._

_She was not to be disappointed, as it was a dingy corridor that was in almost the same state as her previous cell. High up torches sat in grotesque, gargoyle-like holders and the gargantuan flames cast flickering shadows across the features of the people that stood stonily at the sides. _

_All of the gathered people were so motionless and their faces so expressionless that they might have been carved of marble. Their clothes were rich and thick; lined with fur and made for winter. They were in a foreign style that was utterly alien to Kaoru. The great fur lined coats puffed up and up till the whole neck was engulfed and the sleeves widened to outrageous proportions. These costumes would be garish and somewhat impressive if not for their sad state. _

_They were dusty, like books that hadn't been opened and studied for a while. Even their hair was draped and powdered with a dusty substance and sticky spider webs. The white or brown furs were matted with caked on grime that was once a thick liquid. And although the onyx colored furs were coated in the same way, the substance was hardly visible on these and lent them a subtle and shimmering glitter. Dust had settled into the deep creases of the over-large clothing and tiny spiders shivered over the fabrics to their living places. Garish jewels gleamed persistently through the layers of grime on the stiff, frozen hands. _

_Kaoru took a deep breath and a dainty step. First the toes, then the ball of her foot, then the heel and soon the entirety of her weight was upon the floor. She let the breath out of her lungs slowly, testing the peace that seemed to hold still._

_It happened in an outbreak of movement, the simultaneous flurry of dust that clouded the air as the previously still hands rose up into the air and slammed together. It created a sound more thunderous than she had ever heard before. The echoing clap rang in her ears and spun around within her brain as her lungs constricted convulsively as they struggled to bring in pure air. _

_The alien people did not continue their thunderous movements, letting the clogging dust begin to settle before moving their bodies again. They took one step forward in unison and thrust their left arms out to the side, as if pointing the way. The whole time their faces stayed stoic and staring, even as the little creatures, hiding in their intricate dress and white faces, burrowed deeper within the delicate coifs upon their heads. _

_Kaoru's throat constricted in fear but her body came forward out of its own accord. But instead of going straight and following the line of their arms, she turned to face one of the people. She raised a trembling hand to run one finger over the cold cheek of one of the men. Her fingertips came away white with some sort of powder, revealing a warmer skin underneath. As she looked back up to study the broad face and closed eyes, a muscle twitched within one cheek, showing that they were indeed alive and not some futuristic advance in technology. _

_She rubbed her thumb gently over the dry, cracked lips, smoothing away more powder to bring to light a more humanly and emotional visage. The lips tightened visibly as she did so, further exhibiting emotion. He lifted one arm without moving a single muscle in the rest of his body and used the cold hand to turn her head away from him, to face the lined hallways. From the corner of her eyes she caught his lips moving as his voice flowed over her. "You must not become distracted woman. He needs you. You must save him."_

_Kaoru wondered momentarily how this statue-like man could know of Kenshin. "You have done well to come this far. Not many make it to this stage. You must continue on. You have almost reached him." His voice stated once more. Kaoru turned her head back to look at him, startled to see his eyes open and unsettlingly direct in their gaze. Although his eyes were black and glazed over, there was a longing and a pain in them that spoke to her. They were profound and stark within his gaze and so powerful that she could feel them within her own body. And somehow he transmitted to her the terrible fate he suffered would be bestowed upon Kenshin should she not help him. _

_The thought of Kenshin standing there in the hall, with his hair powdered white and beautiful eyes closed and his voice silent…It horrified her to think of him in such a position. _

_She gave the man one more glance, a knowing one this time, and started down the hall once more. Now each person held a story for her, the words written in torn black ink just under their skin and screaming to be let out. Now only the white powder that was not dust at all obscured them and held them back. Now she could see the pain within all their now opened eyes, the same as the first man, black and scarred as the Earth after fire. _

_Kaoru kept here eyes to herself after while, unable to stand seeing such torment on the faces of innocent people. She felt numb after a long time; as if the pain was reaching out to her simply because she was in its vicinity. The young woman stopped only when a pair of grand and bow-covered shoes met her down turned gaze._

_She lifted her eyes up to meet the stern look of a woman who presumably had lined the wall. The woman was flanked by others, who served to effectively cut off the entire passageway. After a few moments of scrutiny that was harsh and cold and altogether uncomfortable, they parted. The middle woman lifted her arm with a flourish, revealing a wall that Kaoru was sure she would have noticed far, far back. But it was what was on the wall that stunned her. _

_There was Kenshin, poor, poor Kenshin. When she had glimpsed him in the market place he had seemed strong and mysterious and handsome. Here before her was the same man…the same man once a strop had been taken to him. _

_There were ugly welts all across his chest and legs and arms; they bled slowly, letting the life within the man drain away in a series of clearly defined paths. A number of cuts made by a knife's grace also ran across him and a few of those were severely infected. The edges of them were gaping open hideously and greenish pus clung to the sides. There was dirt all over him, but that did not hide the bruises that were everywhere, even going so far to disappear beneath the breech cloth that was belted loosely around his waist. _

_One eye was swollen shut but the other regarded her with a doleful expression that pulled at the strings within her heart. The right side of his mouth was entirely misshapen from a massive bruise that had swelled it completely out of proportion and had turned his skin there an unnatural violet that was a sickly yellow at the edges. Where there had once been two intersecting scars there were now two dripping cuts. _

_Kaoru rushed over to him, slowing to a walk just before she reached him. Her hand moved toward his face but she hesitated, and instead placed it gently on his side. At his groan she quickly moved it away to find that it was bloody. 'Please koishii…' sounded his voice though his lips did not move. And so she brushed her lips over his softly, tenderly, lovingly. _

_Almost immediately there was a loud cry and Kaoru jumped, forgetting that he could not protect her and grabbing his shoulders with both hands. At this he issued a deep moan and she hastily removed her hands. She turned to see the people walking toward them en masse and screamed, for their skin had turned black as coal and their eyes white. The spiders crawled from their appendages and started toward Kaoru and Kenshin. She kept screaming and screaming and screaming…_

Kaoru's eyes snapped open and she placed her hand on her heaving chest. "That was the worst of them all." She whispered, closing her eyes. "Kenshin…" she said out loud for the first time, relishing the taste of the word on her lips.

The night's silence surrounded and drowned her while her racing heart tried to calm down. And then…it was broken, shattered by _his_ voice. "Yes koishii? What would you like?"

AUTHOR'S NOTE – This dream sequence was really hard for me to write, so I hope that it satisfies like usual. I don't know why, it was just so…difficult. Anyway, Battousai is HERE!! He officially becomes a major corporeal character next chapter, but he does make a grand entrance here.

Thanks to all my wonderful reviewers – **JMai, jegar sahaduta, LadyNorth76, Becky, Aly the Trickster, bbzachariah **(always happy to provide a little distraction from evil math)**, Reignashii, Goga-tsuna **(je suis française aussi! Mais, j'ai italienne, anglais, "Swedish", et "Native American" aussi.)**, BnK **(every time you review I start blushing from all your compliments!)**, Anonymous, midnightblue123, kokoronagomu, happyloveygirl, Pyro The Fox of Fire, kimi.the.water.spirit **(its great to hear from you again!)**, ThePrinceOfTheFallenDarkness **(your review was very Capt. Jack Sparrow-esque! Me likey!)**, shiks,** and finally, **Laia Moon.**

LAST MONTH'S POLL – Do you speak a language other than English fluently? Which one? (Who knew I had such smart reviewers?)

Vietnamese – 1  
French –7  
Spanish – 6  
Chinese – 1  
Japanese – 5  
Pig Latin – 2  
Urdu – 1  
Malayalam – 1  
Hindi – 1  
Latin – 1  
German – 1

THIS MONTH'S POLL – What was your favorite scene in the movie "The Dark Knight"? Sorry, I love this movie so much I can't help myself!


	5. melt together

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

_Aren't you guys so so so so happy that I'm on time this month? I would be. Anyway, this was a good chapter for me, I had a blast writing the surreal sequence thingy and the (ahem) other part…So - tomorrow I'm going to be in this competition at school called the Ultimate P.O.T.U.S. challenge. Anyone who can tell me what P.O.T.U.S. means will get the next chapter dedicated to them! Yay!_

_This chapter is probably three or four hours early because I have to be up at 5:50 and gone by 6:55 tomorrow morning and won't have time to post it…_

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta reader, the __**Kiyomi**__ half of __**Banana Rum**__._

_WARNING: Ahoy there mateys! There be lime content ahead!_

**.:**These Dreams**:.**

**.:**chapter**.**five**.melt.together:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading: _

"_The Mummer's Dance" by Loreena McKennitt  
_"_Come My Sweet" by Mediaeval Baebes_

"Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind  
And so winged Cupid is painted blind."  
-William Shakespeare

"A man falls in love through his eyes, a woman through her ears."  
Leo Tolstoy

Kaoru's eyes grew huge in shock as the man, Battousai, melted out of the shadows of her darkened room. His lips were pulled into a pleased and predatory smile that made her shiver with its intensity. His eyes were gleaming and golden, the color of a most personal pleasure. His hair was loose and flowing down his back so that it swayed when he moved toward her. The tiny braids in his hair moved back and forth heavily, so that they slapped his thighs and let the moonlight shine on the tightly twisted hair.

His hands were entirely motionless, though she could see that it was a struggle for him to keep them that way. The knuckles were white with strain and his fingers flexed periodically to rid them of a cramp from clenching them so tightly. He was desperately trying to keep himself from snatching her up and carrying her off.

She looked into his eyes steadily because he had enchanted her with them and also because she wanted to confirm that it was _him_. They stared at each other till she gasped and he grasped her heart triumphantly in his eyes. Kaoru was deeply startled by the force of his emotions: his lust, affection, determination, and love. Where was the gentleness that she had seen before?

Kaoru tried to crawl backward, uncomfortable with the realness of the situation. But she was too caught up in her blankets to do so. She ended up in a breathless heap under his amused eyes with blankets wrapped 'round her haphazardly. "I…what..." she stuttered. "How did you…where…"

He knelt down to her level and grinned, shutting her mouth with one soft hand. "Hush koishii." He whispered soothingly. He brushed his cool lips over her fevered ones gently but did not pull away.

"You have freed me koishii. Now you must accept me…"

She grasped at his hair roughly as darkness crawled into her vision.

_Mist tingled on her skin everywhere as her eyes flicked open. She screamed till her lungs burned for air as the mist seared her open eyes. It was like someone had poured liquid metal onto her pupils and then let it spread to cover her whole eye. She snapped them shut once she had enough presence of mind to do so with a hoarse cry. _

_The pain was intense enough to make tears form pools of liquid under her eyes and little whimpers pushed past her lips and into open space. Beneath her eyelids there were bursts of reds and oranges, as if she had looked straight at the haughty sun and had been punished. But the blinding colors soon faded till they were a cooler pale yellow and then a deep, bottomless, emotionless, black. _

_Kaoru opened her eyes again, ready to snap them shut again in a second's notice. She sighed in relief when nothing hurt and her eyes remained painless. _

_She cried out again when the world remained black. Hoping that it was just taking her awhile to adjust to the darkness of wherever she was, she opened her eyes wider, but still nothing happened. Her tiniest finger rose up and gently touched one open eye. It stung marginally and proved that there was nothing shielding her eyes, but it also did not dislodge anything or restore her vision._

_She staggered to her feet and then ran her hands roughly over her body, searching for other burns. She felt nothing but the injuries of previous nights and nearly overbalanced herself in surprise. In none of the other dreams had she had injuries from the very beginning. They had always occurred later on. But now she did. Scabs from the broken mirror. Tender places from bruises. A loosely bandaged arm from the hungry red flower…She also felt no clothing. She was completely bared and vulnerable._

_Kaoru shivered and hugged her arms over her breasts and hoped that no one was around her. Especially Kenshin. She just knew that he would be smirking or staring at her in that beautiful, predatory way of his and she'd have no…_

_A pair of hands grasped her shoulders and she shrieked so that her captor gave an audible wince. She was turned in one direction and marched forward a number of steps till the hands halted her. She could feel another person's breath lightly stir upon her face and shuddered. She did not like being this close to someone she could not see. _

"_There is a man standing in front of you. There is a person standing next to him and to him and to him. The line is so long that it leads far from my vision."__a strangely altered voice announced in her ear, taking its time with each word. "Within this room is your soul mate. You must find him without your eyes, but with your touch and instinct…You have one hour, or everything you have worked for…" the voice sighed. "will be lost." _

_Hesitantly and highly conscious of her nudity, Kaoru lifted one hand and placed it on the first man's chest. She slid it upward till she felt his chin, then farther up till she reached his lips. They were cracked and dry. This was not how Kenshin's lips had felt when he'd kissed her. It was not Kenshin. _

_She went to move to the next one but apparently went the wrong direction, because the hands grabbed her so she could feel the heat of the person's body, and moved her to the other side. This man's lips were far to thin. He was not Kenshin either. _

_The next man was not a man at all but a woman. Kaoru could tell because there was lushness in the lips that was similar to her own. _

_The next man was not Kenshin either. His lips were too wide to be Kenshin's. The next man had lips that were too abbreviated. And so it went. Kaoru was moved to the side each time by the hands that were attached to a body she was far too conscious of, and each time it was not Kenshin. All she had to do was feel their lips to realize that they were not him. _

_They were at what seemed like the hundredth man and she was just touching the man's lips when her guide let out a small sound. So tiny that anyone not paying very good attention would have missed. But because he was so quiet the whole time, she noticed the oddity immediately. _

_This man's lips seemed promising, but that sound kept coming back to her. His lips were not cracked. But that sound…_

_His lips were not too wet. But still that noise…_

_She stopped feeling his face so that her fingers merely rested upon the unknown man's lips without moving. After a long while of thought the sound came again, and it was suddenly clear. _

_Her guide was jealous of the men she was touching, and there was only one who could be so…_

_Kaoru removed her hand from the man in front of her in all haste and spun around, throwing herself at the man behind her. It was immediately clear that she was correct. _

_Sound trumpeted from the room as if every man that she had examined suddenly took up an instrument and blared it in vicious celebration. This was… "Kenshin." She cried out, feeling his arms wrap around her. _

"_Finally, I can cover you up so that these men cannot see you." Sounded his voice and she smiled. He wrapped his clothing around her as best he possibly could so that she was ensconced within his arms._

"_Finally you are mine. I am yours." _

"Finally you are mine and I am yours. You will never leave me."

Kaoru opened her eyes lazily and saw Kenshin leaning over her. This time she was not startled by him, rather, she was accustomed to him now. She liked having him near her, in the real world.

"Say it."

She blinked almost sleepily. "What?"

"I _want_ you to say that you are mine and that you will never leave me."

Kaoru blushed and stumbled through the words under her breath. He smiled, predatory but not satisfied. "I didn't hear you."

"I am yours _forever_ and I will not leave you." Her face was beet red.

Kenshin's eyes were serious as he slid the back of his hand over her cheek. "I accept you wholly, completely, and without reservation. I am bonded to you heart and soul. What is mine is now yours and it is my duty and desire to protect you from all dangers. I belong to you."

Kaoru listened to his words, awed. When the last syllable had slipped into her ears she felt the strongest compulsion to repeat the words. Her lips parted to pronounce them eagerly. "I accept you wholly, completely, and without reservation. I am bonded to you heart and soul. What is mine is now yours and it is my duty and desire to protect you from all dangers. I belong to you." She whispered. Kenshin nodded.

His lips did not wait to press into hers and she opened her mouth to him readily, thirsty for his affection and his taste. His tongue swept over her lips before entering and greedily filled her mouth. It was more than passionate and sweet. It was hungry and devouring as they battled for dominance, dipping in and out of each other's mouths with a desperation that on a deeper level startled them both.

When that failed to be enough he growled deep in his throat and tore the blankets away from her body. She slid her hands under his gi as he pushed her nighttime apparel off her shoulders and out his way. She moaned when his mouth hit her shoulder and dug her nails into his arms when he nipped at her teasingly.

Another of his hands was pushing her clothing even further down, till her breasts were bared. Kaoru tugged his gi off of him so that their naked chests were pressed together. When her hardened nipples pressed into his chest Kenshin became even more enflamed and he rained kisses on her face before moving back down. Her nails dug into his back and her legs wrapped around his waist in a tight embrace. Their bodies were becoming covered in a fine sheen of sweat as their hands grasped at each other's skin. As their mouths marked each other in private places. As their tongues dipped and tasted the skin and flesh of the other. Their moans grew louder in volume as their passion grew.

They were almost completely bared and Kenshin's mouth was just touching the tender swell of one breast when Sano flung the door of Kaoru's room open. "What is the hell is going on here?!" he roared. "Who the hell are you?!"

Kaoru tore away from Kenshin as much as she could and pulled the blanket over them both before Sano could see much more. Kenshin merely chuckled and rolled onto his side next to her and smirked at the glowering Sano. "Sano!" she shrieked. "What are you doing in here?"

His face was deep red as he answered her. "I heard you groaning and thought you were in pain." He shot a poisonous look at Kenshin. "Apparently not."

Kenshin smirked. "Those were moans, if I'm not mistaken, not groans. Please learn to tell the difference."

Kaoru scowled at Kenshin for baiting her friend. "Kenshin."

"Now, I'll ask again. Who the hell are you?" Sano demanded forcefully, planting himself in the doorway.

Before Kaoru could say anything Kenshin had already answered, a smirk on his face. "Kaoru's fiancé – we've just become engaged in fact. But what is _your_ relation to my koishii?"

Sano's face grew scrunched up with anger and his chest swelled so that he looked about to burst. He stepped forward, just inside the door and crossed his arms menacingly. "Get away from Jou-chan before I tear you apart!"

"Sano!"

"Yes Sano, please." Came another voice from behind Sano. It was familiar to Kaoru only because she had heard it earlier that day. Sano moved aside to see Misao standing in the hallway, Aoshi leaning against the far wall. And next to Aoshi was another woman, more beautiful than any other Kaoru had ever seen before. Suddenly she was intensely embarrassed. This was woman made Kaoru look like a pig, or so Kaoru she thought.

Misao stepped past a sputtering Sano without a second thought, although one could clearly see the mischief dancing in her eyes. She was dressed just as richly as before, but now her attire was a silver grey that shimmered with every movement. "So Himura, you've finally found your woman. I see you haven't wasted any time explaining things to her."

She stepped over the mounds of blankets till she could grab his arm and pull him up. Kaoru's cheeks burned red at his blatant nakedness but Misao only handed him a blanket distastefully, as if it was of no interest to her. "Perhaps I should take a look at your arm." remarked the beautiful woman.

Sano groaned. "Another one." He turned around. "Who are you?" But as he stood there his arms fell to his sides and he failed to move in any other way.

"Megumi…Takani." she said but slowly, and she also seemed entranced. Their eyes were focused only on each other and Aoshi moved farther to one side after awhile, looking slightly uncomfortable. Kaoru stood up, making sure the blanket was tight around her when Megumi's lips parted slightly in a lush arrangement.

They moved till they were within inches of one another and their clothing brushed together. Kaoru went to go to Sano but both Kenshin and Misao held her back. Slowly, slowly, Megumi moved one hand to stroke one side of Sano's face. She exhaled softly and whispered, "You must accept me."

Her hand swept over Sano's brow, and Aoshi caught Sano as he collapsed. Misao hurried forward to lay Megumi down beside him, the stunning woman's eyes closing.

Kenshin wrapped his arms tight around Kaoru to keep her from running forward, and pleased as he was to have her in such small quarters with him, he despised the feelings of despair and worry that washed over her. "Calm yourself koishii. Megumi and your friend are only beginning the journey that we have just finished."

Kaoru turned to him, startled. "What do you mean?"

Misao interrupted at this point, clearing her throat with little subtlety. "We should discuss this in the kitchen."

Then Aoshi issued the first words Kaoru had ever heard him say. "And fully dressed."

Not even ten minutes later Kaoru sat next to an affectionate Kenshin, who was dressed in some of Sano's cast-offs, with a confused Yahiko on the other side, and across the table from Misao and Aoshi. She shivered when the candle light cast flickering shadows across the Kenshin's face and made him look like a very seductive and hungry being. She looked back into the amused faces of Misao and Aoshi to focus herself. Kenshin was distracting her of her goal to get information with his little touches. It only served to hinder her that he had practically settled her onto his lap.

"Can we trust him?" Aoshi dared to ask, gesturing slightly to Yahiko.

The young boy looked offended. "Of course you can trust me! Busu here wouldn't let me stay with her if I wasn't trustworthy." He turned to Kaoru with the look of a young boy asking his older sister for help.

Kaoru nodded when Misao glanced at her. It was true. She did trust Yahiko.

"First, how did you know to come here?" Kaoru questioned, leaning forward. Yahiko also looked eager.

Kenshin's breath stirred the hair at her nape when he spoke. "I summoned them the moment we were bonded. Aoshi, Megumi and I became good friends in _Ad alta_ and through him I became a good friend of Misao. I wanted my friends and also others from that place to be here to help explain everything to you."

Aoshi and Misao were both nodding. "And now we're here for you to ask questions. We'll answer them all." Misao said enthusiastically, presumably speaking for them both.

"What are you all?" Kaoru asked, encouraged. She pushed Kenshin's hands away from her waist.

For the first time Misao actually looked uncomfortable. She shifted a bit and then looked up at her husband. "You should explain this." Kaoru could hardly imagine the man saying more than three words, but managed to not to look completely surprised.

He cleared his throat. "We were all once regular people."

Kaoru opened her mouth. "So that means that you aren't regu-"

Misao cut in. "No interruptions."

Aoshi continued on unperturbed. "We were all once regular people, born in our original time periods…Most of us were poor, but a lucky few, like Battousai here, were high up on the social scale. In different ways we all angered different gods and were sent to _Ad alta_, which is a limbo of sorts.

"There, our only hope of escape is to find and woo our soul mates. If we do not do so in a certain period of time, we will be thrown into _Ad infinitum_, where there is no escape. The man you talked to last night in the hall was in _Ad infinitum_, as were his comrades. Once we have found our soul mates we are given one chance for a physical meeting and the rest must be done within the confines of dreams."

Kaoru's mind flashed back to the day in the market. If only she had known who he was and what he would come to mean to her, she would never have let him escape from her. As if reading her mind, Kenshin pulled her even closer. "I did not want to leave you then either, but I had too koishii." Their fingers entwined beneath the table.

"Then how are Megumi and Sano bonding then? They just met." Kaoru asked, feeling an anger rise within her. How come Sano and Megumi could bond so quickly when it had been such a painful journey for Kenshin and herself?

Misao sensed the rising grudge and hurried to quell it. "Kenshin found you through your father and then through your mind a few years later. You can only start to bond right away if you find each other at the same time, in person. That is what happened for them, and we should all be happy for your friend."

Feeling embarrassed by her pettiness and now determined to forget that anger, Kaoru shot a glance at the door. "If Megumi was in _ad alta_, how can she be here?"

Misao had no trouble answering this question. "When in _ad alta,_ we can be summoned for hour long periods by friends of ours who have already found their soul mate."

"When if first met your father, I was on business. The god who sends you to _ad alta_ can also demand tasks of you. I was sent to fight in the war and was, well…lucky enough to meet your father." Kenshin volunteered, surprising them all.

Kaoru took time to digest this and turned to Kenshin. "Now what do we do?"

He smiled gently. "Because you are now a part of me and me a part of you, you have become…immortal, for better lack of a word. We will live hundreds of years together koishii." The last words were spoken earnestly.

"Hundreds of years…" Kaoru whispered. "How old are you?"

Kenshin blushed slightly. "I am many times your senior. I was born in the year 1121 and send to _Ad alta_ in 1140." He nuzzled her neck. "But now that does not matter because we can be together."

Kaoru looked at the other couple expectantly. Misao looked down. "1734."

Aoshi looked less discomfited by his unapparent age. "I am as old as Kenshin. We were sent to _Ad alta_ in the same year."

There was a rather strained silence as Aoshi calmly studied his tea, Misao fidgeted with the ribbon of her kimono, and Kaoru tried to keep Kenshin from laying her down on the floor and ravishing her. "Who did you anger?" Kaoru asked suddenly. "And how?" she couldn't resist that last one.

Misao was the first to answer. "I was not sent to _Ad alta_. 1734 is the year Aoshi made me his soul mate." She wrapped her tiny hand around Aoshi's large palm in a supporting gesture.

"I angered a god by slaughtering his representative animal when it attacked me." Aoshi said reluctantly, and at Kaoru's curious expression, explained further. "It is a god from far southwest. He is not commonly known here."

"What did the animal look like?" Yahiko questioned, breaking his long silence.

Aoshi raised an eyebrow at him. "You would not like to know."

They all turned their eyes on Kenshin then, waiting for him to speak and share his experience. Still, he did not answer and kept his face down turned. "Kenshin," Kaoru started. "How were you sent to _Ad alta_?"

"Kenshin?" Misao prodded.

"I did not anger any of the gods." He said, slowly.

"Then how did you get into _Ad alta_?" Misao asked curiously, leaning forward. And although he did not show it, Aoshi was also very curious about the events surrounding Kenshin's entrance into their previous prison.

"I summoned a god. The trickster, Loki." He whispered.

AUTHOR'S NOTE – _Ad alta_ Latin for "to the summit"

Alas, but there is another cliff hanger. I don't think this one is as bad as the other though. Read the starting note for my challenge and compete to WIN WIN WIN!

Okay, back to the sane me. I want to thank all my reviews! I'm astounded by how many reviews I get each month – I've never gotten so many before. Thank you to **M-shizzle**, **Reignashii **(hopefully this chapter will revive you…), **BnK **(faints from the pleasure of your review),** Kosei-san, Kenjutsu Princess**, **LadyNorth76**, **JMai**, **kokoronagomu **(hey hey hey! Look at what you wrote in my review! That quite pretty. you could rival me any day. Seriously. You should see the first drafts. They suck.), **miniwoo, kimi.the.water.spirit **(ew…college work…),** skenshingumi, allie, bbzachariah **(where's your brother?)**, Shenhui, moonlightshade, The White tiger Natumi-Sama **(I love the Discovery channel!), **Minni May Yukibara, Temari's Angel, RedWingedAngel002,** and last but not least **Aly the Trickster **(you know, about 7 people have said that he died when he really didn't. I mean, yeah he was hanging off the building, but he didn't die. The police force only took him into custody – probably back to Arkham.)

LAST MONTH'S POLL - What was your favorite scene in the movie "The Dark Knight"?

Batman & his motorcycle rebounding off the wall – 1  
Nurse Joker – 3  
Joker & Batman speaking of chaos - 1  
Bruce blaming everything on Alfred the Butler - 1  
Haven't seen the movie – 3 (me: tsk tsk…)  
The whole movie – 3 (YAY!)

THIS MONTH'S POLL – What is your favorite school subject (and yes, lunch does count)?


	6. depart from me

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

_**Happy Day After Halloween!**__ Mmmm…it's raining here…I just love that. I really love the rain and the wind and the cold. It's just marvelous!_

_Here we are, right at the beginning of the next chapter, and Megumi's a bad girl in this one…So this is a really short chapter and it's totally designed to let you all stew in your juices for a month or so. This is the point of no return. It gets serious from here on out._

_On a less serious point, I just wanted to take a moment to advertise a new story I have. Its called "Big Smile Please" and its just a bunch of loosely connected shorts dealing with the relationship of Heath Ledger's Joker and what might be his last victim. They are sporadically written though, and there isn't a true plot. All the same, I'd really like you all to review and tell me what you think. Thanks!_

_So, enjoy!_

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta reader, the __**Kiyomi**__ half of __**Banana Rum**__, and to __**Moriah**__, for dressing up like a pirate wench on Halloween and telling me that 'I ride'._

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
.:**chapter**.****.**from**.**me**:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading:_

"_Have A Little Faith in Me" by Mandy Moore_

"Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first and the lesson afterward." –Vernon Law.

They sat for empty minutes in silence, unsure of what to think.

"You summoned a god and it sent you to _ad alta_?" Aoshi questioned, his brow furrowing in the slightest way.

"You cannot be sent to _ad alta_ for _summoning _a god!" Misao protested, her grip on Aoshi's arm clearly tightening. "Surely you misunderstood!"

Kenshin turned to Kaoru, seeking comfort in her warmth, and pulled her into his chest. Kaoru sank down willingly, sensing his need, but not before she saw the shame in his eyes, the feelings that were gnawing away at his insides.

"Kenshin," Kaoru began. "How did you summon the god…"

"Loki." Supplied a voice from the door.

They all turned to see Megumi leaning against the door frame. Her face and clothes were damp with sweat and her hair was mussed. But instead of making her look like a vagabond, it lent her a sensual air. The damp clothing did not hang limply, it clung to her limbs determinedly and her hair made her look like she'd just come from her lover, which was probably true.

"You're up already?" Misao asked, surprise in her voice.

"I am not a weakling, and a bonding does not tire me so much as it does my new soul mate. He is sleeping soundly." She added on at Kaoru's alarmed glance.

As soon as she glanced at the woman, Kaoru looked down again at her yukata, which still draped awkwardly over her from its hurried donning. Her hair was in a messy ponytail that more than likely looked like a bird's nest. How was she supposed to entice her soul mate with this woman around?

"How do you know about the god?" Kaoru demanded, bringing the conversation back to its original topic and hating the jealousy curdling her stomach. After all, it was clear that Aoshi and Misao didn't know about it. So how did _Megumi_?

Megumi's eyes locked onto Kaoru's, and one elegant eyebrow rose. A small smile turned the corners of her lips up slightly like a maid would do the covers of a bed. "Kenshin told me of course. When we were in _ad alta_ together." Kaoru's answer was a stiffening of her lips.

"Why would you tell Megumi and not us?" demanded Misao, tactless as always.

Kenshin shrugged around Kaoru, the muscles in his arms visibly straining as Megumi settled leisurely against the wall at his left. His hair hid his eyes when he finally spoke. "Megumi…When Megumi and I were in _ad alta_, we were…quite close."

"Intimately so." Megumi interrupted, her eyes focused on Kaoru.

Kenshin swallowed and Kaoru kept trying to find comfort in the gentle rumbling that swept through his chest when he spoke. "We were together a long time. And Megumi, I felt that with Megumi that…" his head dipped even lower till his head was almost resting on the top of Kaoru's. "I just told her."

By the last of his words, Kaoru was stiff and cold. There was an emotion in his words that fed the feelings of betrayal and jealousy and hurt that were beginning to fester inside of her. She tried to tell herself that it was no matter, that she and Kenshin were soul mates. But it was so new and the relationship as tender as a spring flower just peeking up from the ground, so easily were the petals bruised and crushed. It failed to quash the bubbling mixture that burned her heart.

Misao and Aoshi were turned to each other, holding a conversation with their eyes. Megumi had her eyes closed, resting when she could, though here ears were certainly pricked to catch any noise from the man resting in the other room. Yahiko studied his hands uncomfortably, aware of the tension in the room.

It created the feeling that they, a legendary sword master and a small dojo assistant master, a killer and one whose teachings preserved life, a man and a woman, Himura Kenshin and Kamiya Kaoru, were alone.

Slowly, hesitantly, Kaoru looked up into Kenshin's eyes, trying to convey her feelings.

She uncurled one arm from around his chest and then the other.

Untangled their entwined legs.

Removed his arms from where they embraced her.

Lifted her head from his broad chest, his beating heart.

Kaoru removed herself from his arms, sat away from him so that even in the same room, they were a million miles apart…

_CLIFF HANGER ALERT! CLIFF HANGER ALERT! Jeez…I'm using so many of these nowadays, I hope you all aren't getting tired of me…In my defense, I never intended to use a cliffhanger here. I actually wanted this chapter to be really long. But as soon as I got to that point, I just stopped, looked at the screen, and couldn't help but feel the completion of the chapter…sorry guys!_

_No one figured out what POTUS means! How sad! For those out of the loop (all of you!), POTUS means "Presidents Of The United States" it's a challenge for us seniors to memorize a million useless facts about all 44 of our presidents and then compete with every government class. I won my class!_

_Even though no one got it, I still got to thank you all for being loyal and awesome reviewers. I swear, if it wasn't for you all, this story wouldn't see the light of day! Thanks to __**Reignashii**__, __**Shenhui, JMai**__ (yeah, his tolerance was gone by then! Mine would be too!), __**BnK **__(Happy Belated Birthday! I'm glad you approved of that…ahem…2__nd__ best part…),__** .**__, __**Ken and Kao forever**__, __**Aly the Trickster **__(yeah, that was a bit tricky, but it'll be taken care of in the next chapter or so. He was the only god that I could find that really fit what I wanted, so I had to use him…and I wouldn't want them to recast Joker either!), __**bbzachariah **__(I miss nap time…), __**midnightblue123**__, __**Laia Moon**__, __**skenshingumi**__, __**Cosmic-lover**__, __**Temari's Angel **__(don't worry. There'll be a few more…)._

LAST MONTH'S POLL – What is you favorite school subject (and yes, lunch does count)? No one said history! I LOVE LOVE LOVE European History. The Vikings, Saxons, Ostrogoths, Visigoths, Vandals, Romans, the Renaissance, the Protestant Reformation, Baroque, French Classicism, _politiques_, Elizabethan settlements…(shudders in ecstasy…).

Lunch – 2

English – 1

General Science – 2

Art – 2

Algebra – 1

General Math – 1

Nap time – 1

Government – 1

Food tech – 1

Biology -1

Chemistry – 1 (I really liked chemistry too, but I just happen to stink at it!)

THIS MONTH'S POLL – Favorite season of the year?


	7. my explanation

Disclaimer: In no way, shape or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except…for the mangas in my room…) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except…for the one you're reading right not…)

_AN – Yes this is an early, celebratory chapter. And you want to know why?_

_I GOT ACCEPTED INTO COLLEGE!!!!!!!_

_I'm so happy, I've already been accepted into a college that I applied for two weeks ago. Two weeks ago! Now, for this college, I just have to wait for other responses and then, if I choose this college, I just sign my letter of intent. And even if I don't get accepted into any others, I've still got my ace in the hole. _

_And you know what, you should be happy that I got accepted too, because its what's getting you an early chapter!!!!!_

_I got accepted to college!  
__I got accepted to college!  
__I got accepted to college!  
__I got accepted to college!  
__I got accepted to college!_

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta reader, the __**Kiyomi**__ half of __**Banana Rum**__, and to __**Monique**__ and __**Moriah**__, for squealing just as loud as me when they heard the news_

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
****.:**seven**.**my**.**explanation**:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading:  
_"_Dirty Little Secret" by The All-American Rejects  
_"_Fallen" by Sarah Mclachlan_

"The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple."

- Oscar Wilde

Kenshin felt the loss of Kaoru keenly. After Megumi's powerful manipulation, Kaoru had escaped to her father's old room, blocking the door so securely that not even Aoshi could open it. Misao had pleaded at the threshold for hours, trying to cajole Kaoru into coming out. Kaoru had ignored her, staying silent and pensive throughout the night. She'd only come out the next day, hours after noon, to each a late lunch with the majority of her guests. That'd signified an easy truce with Yahiko, Misao, and Aoshi. Kenshin and Megumi had been the only ones to act as interlopers, as Sano was still letting his body recuperate from his joining.

At the first sight of them, Kaoru had shot up from her seat and would have left the room in the same manner as a silent tornado had Kenshin and Megumi not blocked her pathway. Now she sat across the room from him, gazing at nothing in particular.

Kenshin's feelings of pain and rejections and need to make her understand was so strong that it was tearing him apart inside, winding his nerves tighter and tighter and tighter, the nose of a clock personified. Every molecule of his body and soul missed Kaoru.

His soul had basked in the radiance of the smile she had bestowed upon him. His body had glowed with the warmth she had radiated from her person. His heart had beaten harder when her head had rested upon it. His head had spun with the wonder of having such an incredible soul mate.

But now that she was gone, the world seemed emptier and colder and crueler than ever before in history. She wasn't actually _gone_, he rationalized. She was in the same room as him, after all. But there was no more warmth or love or affection. Her large eyes, the pupils enlarged till the irises were only thin ribbons of blue life, held only anger for him. Anger that glittered in the all encompassing black pupils and smothered the hurt that just barely sat within the tiny bands of her irises.

If he let those emotions continue on much longer between them, there would an unbearable distrust and hatred that would brew in her eyes. She would perform the ultimate _fukushuu_, the ultimate destruction of what he was, by figuratively carving his heart out and placing it in an icy cage of isolation and insanity.

Resting her body still so wearied from the day's events, Kaoru haltingly pulled her limbs in. It was a futile attempt to make her body smaller and escape the familiar pull and tug of Kenshin's gaze. When a new pair of eyes settled themselves comfortably onto her, Kaoru lifted her head. It took all that she was to not look at Kenshin, and instead return the steady gaze of Takani Megumi.

Megumi's eyes were dark and unfathomable, appraising and insulting. Kaoru didn't bother to hide the jealousy turned fury that churned under her skin, and felt the unconscious pull of all her muscles to leap across the room and strangle the one thing that had ruined her happiness with Kenshin. A small tendril of satisfaction curled in her belly when she saw that Megumi recognized her thoughts and was frightened of them.

Misao, who had scooted slightly behind Aoshi in fear of the actions of the three people, spoke. Her words served to break the veil that had separated the two worlds, and Kaoru's head snapped to look at her. "You never answered our question Kenshin. Why were you sent to _Ad alta_?" she said, enunciating each syllable carefully.

Aoshi looked sharply down at his wife, as if begging her to not provoke the situation any further.

There was a deep sigh that emanated from Kenshin. It drew in, swelling his whole frame, and then pushed out, making it seem like his body was collapsing in on itself. Before he spoke, he looked up at Kaoru, and made sure that their eyes kept in contact the whole time. "There was a stranger here, a white man shipwrecked. He entranced many of us on many a night. He told us about his traditions, his gods, his people. He told me that Loki liked to help the needy."

"I summoned Loki on a…whim. I wanted him to trick the heart of the girl that I…love…loved into wanting me, Tomoe. When he appeared before me I was awestruck."

Kaoru tried to shield her eyes when his mouth moved to pronounce the word _love_, but Kenshin wouldn't have it. He used his whole body and lunged toward her, his hand snatched out and grasped the bottom of her chin, causing Kaoru to bite down on her bottom lip and her skin to burn. His fingers seared her face, the pads of his fingers sending bolts of heat throughout her entire body. Out of the corner of her eye, Kaoru spotted Aoshi becoming tenser and Megumi perking up in interest. Kenshin continued, his voice becoming increasingly broken.

"He had a huge smile on his face, as if he knew…as if he was planning something. I told him my request, the capture of my love's heart. He agreed. He said I had…had to do something for him."

Kenshin's eyes grew more anguished and his muscles tighter. His grip on her became slightly painful. "He said that I had to k…ki…kill someone. He said, _'Kill a woman for me before the next Samhein and do it with no feeling in your heart. Then you will face that woman on Samhein night and you will not shed a tear.'_"

_(AN – I know I don't normally do this, but I feel that I must explain. Samhein (sow-EN), is an ancient Celtic holiday, the 31__st__ of October. The ancient Celts believed that the veil between the living and dead worlds was so thin that the dead could walk freely. To lure the dead away from their homes, the Celts paraded to the edge of their villages with offerings. It was said to be the best night for fortune telling, and when the gods were most powerful. It, and the Roman festival of Pomona, which is on the same night, are the origins of our modern day Halloween. Of course, this was before all the ancient Christians came, and Constantine converted, and they all tried to banish paganism and then got pissy when they couldn't…)_

"I wanted to be lov…loved so much that I agreed. I c…cut my arm and bl…bled on his sacred ground to seal our b…bargain. One week later I had the perfect opportunity.

"She was walking alone down a deserted path. When she went to…to pass me by, I…I moved in front of h-her." As he spoke, it seemed that he slipped so deep into his memories that he could not discern between them and the real world. His hand slid down to encircle Kaoru's neck unconsciously. The rest of the people did not notice, so entranced by the story were they.

"She t-t-tried to run away but I gr-grabbed her, I pu…pushed her d-down and put my knee on her ch-chest. She s-sc-screamed and cl-clawed at me. I was in a t-trance. I couldn't think. I h-hit her.

"I w-wr-wrapped my h….hands around her th-throat and I s-squeeze…" He was forced to stop and pause for a moment, the turbulent emotions crippling his ability to speak. A few hesitant tears skidded down his cheeks and his grip grew ever-so-slightly tighter upon her neck.

"I squeezed her n-neck and she pull…pulled at my hands. I couldn't s-st-stop. I couldn't let anything stop me. I kept on tightening my hands and she…she started to wheeze…she started turn…turning purple. I didn't stop. I didn't stop till she wouldn't m-move. She just l-lay there and she didn't move."

He jerked his face to within centimeters of Kaoru's and his hand on her throat tightened into an iron grip of regret. "I didn't stop!" he shouted at her, the tears running freely this time. He slumped into her, caging her stiff limbs in his arms.

"Kenshin…Kenshin not so tight." A deep voice murmured, and Kaoru was startled to see that it was Sano, looking somewhat haggard but unhurt. He placed his hands on Kenshin's shoulders and pulled the smaller man away, settling him against the opposite wall again, a good way away from Kaoru.

Kaoru put a hand to her throat. Her swallow had a painful edge to it, but that was not what she was thinking of. Before her very eyes, the man who she was bonded too, had torn open his past and soul and threw it before her eyes. For her to study, judge, scorn, laugh at, hate.

"That year, on Samhein night, he met with the god Loki once more." Megumi's smooth but curiously unemotional voice filled the room as Sano stood next to her, a faux nonchalant. "The ghost of the woman he murdered was called by the god and she faded into sight before him."

Kaoru's eyes were glued to Megumi, studying ever movement, every nuance of the svelte woman. "When he saw her he could no longer hold in the feelings that haunted him day and night, that he had hidden inside all that time, and he began to cry. The woman launched herself at his heaving form, using every amount of force left within her to become corporeal. Her mark upon him is seen as two bisecting scars on his face, where all could see.

"When the god saw this he began to laugh, he laughed so hard that the earth shook. The two forms, one ghostly and the other solid, stopped and stood before him, starring. Kenshin then threw himself on the ground in front of the god and begged," she sniffed, "_pitifully_, for what he had been promised."

Kaoru's hands grew tight and her fingernails dug into her palms till they broke the skin one by one and drew blood. Megumi continued on unapologetically. "Loki sneered at him and said, _'How could I give a woman to such an emotional man? How could I give a woman to a __**murderer**__? He might kill her. You broke our deal, and so you shall be punished.' _At this, Loki exiled Kenshin to _ad alta_ and turned to the ghostly woman before him. She too, had angered him, as she hadn't paid him the proper respect. As it was Samhein night, his powers had multiplied. With a flick of one finger, he sent her to _ad alta_ and let her keep her corporeal form."

Sano moved protectively closer to Megumi when she finished tale although he could do nothing to hide the astonished expression on his face. Aoshi and Misao held hands tightly, the skin at the knuckles showing white, their faces showing that they were unsure of what to do. Kenshin sat slumped over, but still he faced Kaoru and searched for acceptance within her soul.

Frankly, Aoshi was astounded at how much he did not know about closest friends. "How do you know all of this?" he questioned Megumi, watching the tense expression on Sano's face warily.

Megumi was slow in answering. "I…was the woman that Kenshin killed." She whispered, although she refused to hide her gaze from anyone in the room.

Silence reigned supreme in the small, over crowded room. Kenshin stood up slowly, as if trying to shake off the bad memories any way he could. Sano looked sharply at Kenshin, his eyes narrowing in anger. Misao rushed to Kaoru's side and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. Aoshi's lips tightened into a thin line as he too stood, preparing to stop any conflict that might arise.

Kaoru kept still for many moments only by sheer force of will. Her head throbbed with the revelations that had just been forced upon her. She blinked as the world faded back and forth between black and a stunning whirlwind of colors. One hand struck out blindly, searching for something and it was grasped by a pair of firm, warm hands. Kenshin – he'd rushed across the room to hold her.

Once her vision cleared she stood up and paced to the center of the room. Her eyes blazed with a fury that could not be rivaled. Megumi stood up too, and shaking off Sano's hands, she strode to meet the other woman. They stood there, the world revolving around them and breath hitching in the throats of all near them.

"I have no claim on Kenshin." Megumi said, her voice so low that none but Kaoru could pick up her words.

"You lie. You marked him." Kaoru's eyes were no longer their usual color of the calm sky. Now they were the color of ripened blueberries, darker and more mysterious, more tempting.

"That is not a sexual claim."

"Then you deny a romantic relationship with him…" Kaoru drawled out her words.

"Yes. What a person you must think me to believe that I would fuck the man who murdered me." Megumi snarled, her face inching closer. She was losing control.

"Truly you have given me no other option to believe. If a whore is your inner nature than so be it."

Megumi smiled sweetly, as if amused by Kaoru's taunt. "If I am a whore, then surely you must be a bitch without enough thought in her head to wonder if a man is worth being injured for." Her hand snaked out and gripped Kaoru's lightly bandaged, but still tender arm.

Kaoru hissed and stepped back, but didn't miss a beat. "You put the guilt upon Kenshin's shoulders. You ruined his future. You marked him in a way nobody should be proud of. And yet you puff your chest out for all to see. You say that you would not fuck your murderer, and yet you form a friendship with him. Tell me, what kind of twisted mind do you hide behind that sweet little face of yours?"

"Nothing worse than you shelter behind that mask of a sweaty little dog."

Kaoru made a little jerk with her body, as if the anger swelling under skin could not be controlled. But before she could do little else, Sano was there. His face showed that he was furious. Growling slightly to ward anyone else away from his mate, not particularly aware of who was in front of him, he pushed Kaoru. Hard.

Surprised, Kaoru stumbled back but was unable to regain her balance. She stuck her injured arm out on instinct and landed hard on the floor. Her eyes welled up in pain as her entire weight was slammed down onto the healing limb and quickly brought it to her chest to protect it. Misao scurried to her side and helped her to stand up. Kenshin was in Sano's face before Kaoru even hit the ground. His eyes glowed with amber flames that snapped and hissed with fury at another man harming what he considered _his_.

Faster than he could draw in a breath, Sano was on the floor, his arms pinned behind him with an enraged Battousai kneeling into his back. Megumi was tugging on Sano's assailant and frantically trying to pull him off before Sano was seriously injured. Aoshi gently removed the upset woman and less gently yanked the red haired man away from his victim. Scowling, he shoved Kenshin at a sniffling Kaoru and then descended on Misao, pulling her away and standing in front of her as a protector.

Playing the mediator, Aoshi herded the very angry Megumi and glowering Sano into one room and then shuffled a distrusting Kaoru and still furious Kenshin into another. Before he shut the door to Kaoru and Kenshin's room he snarled at them, "You will stop acting like insolent children and discuss this like adults! Act accordingly to the title of the strongest Battousai!"

_Author's Note – so I'm a little scared of what you'll say about this chapter. I'm a little iffy on how Kenshin's emotions are expressed here, so I hope that you really like it. A lot of you told me that you didn't like Megumi and Kenshin having a relationship, as is, a romantic relationship. Well, I'm here to tell you that they never did have one! They had a close friendship, but it was never romantic. I'm sorry if that was the impression I gave (well, Megumi gave.) Meg just wanted to make Kaoru angry. (sighs) its just the way she is…_

_Question From Reader: (courtesy of BnK) _And second I was just wondering if you know where your going to take this story and know how you want it to be or are just taking it as you go?

_Answer: Yes, I do know where this is going. In fact, this entire story is written in its entirety. So worry not my friend._

_Anyway, in case you haven't heard, I GOT ACCEPTED TO A COLLEGE!!!!!!! That's why this update is so early. I will update again on the first of December for you to._

_I want to thank my beautiful and continuously incredible and supportive and gentle and sweet and flattering (yes, I'm on a total high) reviewers: __**Ken and Kao forever**__, __**kokoronagomu**__, __**skenshingumi**__, __**Celestial Raven**__, __**bbzachariah**__, __**Cosmic-lover**__,__**BnK **__(if you read this last author's note, your eyes will stop burning…=), I only play tennis as a hobby), __**.**__, __**Aly the Trickster **__(get any good candy?),__** demon*feathers**__, __**michihiki-hara26**__,__**Reignashii**__, __**K**__ (see, I'm helping to fill your Kenshin quota!)._

LAST TIME'S POLL: Favorite season of the year?

Spring – 3  
Autumn – 5  
Summer - 1  
Winter - always has my vote! This is my ultimate, favorite season. I love the cold and rain and sleet and hail! Its just marvelous!

THE NEW POLL OF THE MONTH: favorite board game. Do you like Monopoly, checkers, what?


	8. i am so sorry

Hey guys...This must be really disappointing to you right now, and trust me, no one is sorrier than I.

Yes, this is an Author's Note. The dreaded, horrible author's note. I'm writing to tell you that I cannot post the next chapter of "These Dreams" right now. As much as I'd like to stick to my rigid schedule, my computer has somehow become riddled with viruses...despite the software we bought to prevent that (total waste). My story is safe and sound on my jump drive/portable USB/whatever its called, but I can't risk contaminating everything I have on there by connecting it to my computer.

We are getting someone to do System Restore for us and to re-program everything, but that can take some time. I promise that I am doing everything in my power to get that done as fast as possible. If its done reasonably fast, then I'll probably post the chapter in the middle of the month. (IF ITS DONE!) If not, and its done with maybe a week left, then I won't post till January. Once again, I promise you that I am doing everything I can to get the problem fixed. Sorry!

Ah, while I'm here, I'd like to address some concerns you brought to me about the last chapter. I know a lot of you didn't especially like Kenshin crying, which I'm okay with. You're entitled to your own opinion. But one/some of you said that you thought that it was "weak" of him. Even though you are entitled to your own opinion, I am offended by this.

A strong man crying is NOT weak! For example, my father was the strongest man I've ever met, and I saw him cry. I just do not agree when you say Kenshin crying is "weak".

As an explanation - when the body is under a lot of stress it tends to need a release - crying. Kenshin has been holding in this secret, which is causing him great amounts of stress, for thousands of years. When he was forced to recount his painful tale to the one person he truly loved, a person thinking about leaving him due to said tale, his stress multiplied. And it mixed with the remorse he still felt. And he cried. I'm not going to change his actions because I feel that they are the best representation of true human emotions and reactions, and of the character, that I could write for that situation. I'm sorry if you do not feel the same way.

Anyway, I'm working on my computer, I'll update as soon as I can. Please have patience with me. Please. If you all like this story as much as you've been telling me, it shouldn't be too hard to wait if you know that I have a good excuse. Thanks!

Late March


	9. do you trust me

_Disclaimer: In no way, shape, or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except...for the mangas in my room...)or do I claim ownership of their stories (except...for the one you're reading right now...)_

_AN – I'M BAAAAAACK!_

_Okay guys, here I am. I'm finally updating, but the hold is tenuous. My computer has not survived the system restore very well, but the show must go on. I'm updating in the middle of the month because I didn't think you'd want me to wait any longer. Lets just hope this fulfills your jones for the story till the first of February._

_In other news, literally as I was getting this ready to post, I got another acceptance letter from another college!!!!!!! And to make it even more exciting, it's the college that I'm longing desperately to go to: Mills. I'm so happy I think I'm glowing! Okay, I'm done. Back to business._

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta reader, the **Kiyomi **half of **Banana Rum**, and to **ChaosHat**, for being so nice and such a sweetheart. Thanks! Finally, to my Aunt Carol, for reasons that need not be said._

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
****.:**chapter**.**eight**.**do**.**you**.**trust**.**me**:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading:  
_"_Saturate Me" by Mandy Moore_

"_And when you wanted me,  
I came to you.  
And when you wanted someone else,  
I withdrew.  
And when you asked for light,  
I set myself on fire.  
And if I go far away,  
I know you'll find another slave_."

-What You Are// Audioslave.

The room they were so unceremoniously tossed into was Kaoru's, so a mound of rumpled blankets lay on the floor just as they had been left. They were a blatant testament to the passion that had brewed between them not so long ago and Kaoru blushed when she saw them. Shadows sat forlornly on the walls in the darkened room and watched as Kaoru stared at Kenshin.

He was bent over, with his palms pressed flat against the wooden floor. Kaoru could tell that he was trying desperately to regain control of his emotions and failing horribly. From her vantage point to his right, she could see clearly that his chest was moving in great heaves. He looked so vulnerable at that moment that sudden wave of emotion swept through her and she desperately wanted to wrap her arms around him and place her head above his heart.

Her body wished it to be so much that Kaoru actually had to forcefully command her limbs to be still. Although hearing the story that surely still tortured him inside had softened her, she was still unready to open her mind and embrace him completely once more. It pained Kaoru to admit it even to herself, but she still harbored a jealousy of the beautiful Megumi.

Kenshin let out a forceful growl that had a startled Kaoru clutching at her sleeping yukata. Kenshin growled once more, but softer and more tortured this time. The powerful emotions that had engulfed him and were still sweeping through his body had made his skin ultra-sensitive to the slightest sensation. Even the soft, worn-out gi and hakama he was wearing abraded his skin fiercely. What his flesh really yearned for was to be free of restraints and pressed intimately against Kaoru's soft side.

He needed Kaoru. She was like a shot of opium every time she touched him, so much as looked at him. And every time she pulled away he felt like an addict locked in a prison without his poison.

He wanted to be the sun above her, to let her supple body stretch under his delighting rays. He wanted to be the tree she could curl under and to thrust roots deep to protect her. He yearned to plant seeds deep in her body and give her children to suckle at her breast. He wanted to be the one she lived and breathed and he wanted to do the same for her. All these things he wanted.

But they could be taken care of later, they required more time than he could tolerate. There were more basic, pressing matters to take care of at the moment.

Kaoru's eyes widened as Kenshin violently tore at his borrowed clothing with tensed and white hands. The seams ripped easily and the fabric almost willingly submitted to his strange ministrations. Soon his gi was in shreds on the floor and Kaoru stared at him. His muscles were bulged and tense, there were cords of strain running up and down his arms and neck. She could see that even the muscles in his back were over-extended and Kaoru wanted to run her fingers down his spine and calm him. Although, Kaoru realized as her fingers itched to do so, that might have the exact opposite affect on him…

Even so, Kenshin looked basic and primal. He was a primal being trying to force itself into the modern times of Meiji Japan. Kaoru shivered as she studied every line of his hard body. It aroused her to see him so frenzied and out of control because of her. He was very appealing to her and the thought of being roughly ravished against a wall made her breathing quicken. She blushed at the pleasure gathering between her thighs and squeezed them together tight.

As she was subtly trying to suppress those feelings for another time, Kenshin's nose took a delicate sniff of the air, then another for the pure pleasure of it. Kaoru was wondering what he was doing when his head slowly turned toward her. The gold of his eyes were predatory, all-knowing, and gold, like a huge mountain cat. His lips curved up into an extremely smug smile, baring gleaming white and sharp teeth. Kaoru's breath caught and her cheeks turned bright red. '_He knows…'_ her mind agonized, mortified that he could smell her desire.

She reached out a trembling hand that slowly extended toward the scarred tissue of his shoulder. But just before her fingertips could graze the tensed muscle and tanned skin they pulled back. Kenshin shuddered and groaned, his body yearning for her to touch him again. His eyes glowed brighter with need. "Battousai?" Kaoru asked timidly, unconsciously trying to seek a way to calm both of them.

Kaoru hardly had any time to react before he was upon her. Kenshin's corded body stretched intimately over her as he stretched her over the rumpled blankets. His tongue gently traced the shell of her ear before he whispered, "My name is Kenshin _koishii_…"

His lips soon traced a path down her arched neck, then up to her jaw line. He placed his lips just under the hard bone of her lower jaw and sucked harshly till he had purposefully marked her. Kenshin then moved up to her lips, tracing the outline with his tongue before moving on; Kaoru's eyelids and cheekbones were peppered with soft kisses placed there by soft, dry lips. She didn't open her eyes when he bestowed a luscious kiss on her lips, nipping at her bottom lip till she opened to him.

Kaoru unconsciously responded his pleasure-giving lips with the motions that he liked most. Her tongue soon remembered the skill with which he had kissed her before and mimicked it. Within seconds Kenshin was groaning as her tongue wrapped around his and her hips rubbed against his. She dragged her nails down his spine in response to his forceful ministrations and squealed into his mouth when Kenshin pinched one pink nipple through her yukata in retaliation.

"Mine…you are unhurt…you...are...mine…" he whispered against her lips and that only further spurred the wetness between her legs. He pulled open her sleeping yukata, still loose from their last rendez-vous, and then deftly removed it from her completely. His mouth then landed on the underside of her breasts. He marked her again there, on the ripe swell of soft flesh, and Kaoru sucked in a deep breath.

Instead of lingering on the breasts that yearned for him he moved downward across her stomach. Little licks placed here and there made her jump and then shiver as the saliva cooled on her skin. He groaned as her foot rubbed his calf absently. Halfway down he switched his attentions to her left wrist. He bit gently at the big blue veins there and then pressed a kiss into her palm.

Kaoru pushed herself up on her other arm to watch what he was doing, entranced, as he sucked one of her fingers into his mouth. The heat of his mouth pulled at her and went straight to her sensitive breasts and the warmth between her legs. Kenshin sucked on the digit one more time before nipping the fingertip and setting her hand down. After that he bent his body down to lave her hip.

Kenshin didn't stop there. He continued down her leg until he reached her knee. There he examined the joint thoroughly with his fingers and eyes. Then his long fingers danced down her calf, massaging as they went and eliciting as sigh from Kaoru. This made him pause and look up, pleased that he had managed to pleasure her so much. He worked his way back up her other leg in much the same way, but once he got to her other hip, he stopped.

Kaoru stopped concentrating on _trying _to keep her breathing even and looked deep within his eyes. Kenshin hardly moved for a long time, but then he gently pushed her to lie back down. Then he bestowed a gentle kiss on one hard nipple and slowly placed his head between her breasts. With a sigh he lay there, letting his arms wrap around her and his legs tangle with hers. A deep comfort sank into their bones, pulling them down upon each other. "Kaoru…" he intoned against her skin, completely intoxicated by her nearness. Kaoru let her eyes close as she felt his entire body relax.

This physical bond was what calmed them, and cooled the arguments that had nearly ruined them not so long ago. Her anger at him and his pain sank into the floor board, dripped past the slivers of compacted wood, and fell to the earth, impotent.

Neither of them kept track of how long they lay there like that, but Kenshin's breath on her skin and Kaoru's hands stroking his hair lulled both of them into an almost sleep. It seemed like five long minutes, but in all actuality, the moving shadows cast on the floor by the some conveyed a two hour period. After awhile, Kenshin lazily pulled the blankets up to just cover the small of his back. That was as far as he could reach in such a position and the sensual warmth of Kaoru's skin was enough to keep his heart warm. The movement, however, caused Kaoru to wake up enough to remember what they were supposed to be doing.

"Kenshin?"

"Hmmm?"

"I need you to tell me what you feel for Megumi." Shamefaced, Kaoru turned her face away from Kenshin's probing gaze.

"I think that she's a good woman, an honest woman." He was looking smug again at her pained look, his muscles more relaxed than ever before, but this time it was laced more with care than with amusement. "But she doesn't hold my heart."

He slid up Kaoru's body till their faces were even and he braced his weight on his forearms. "I swear to you Kaoru, you are the only one I love. I hold more love for you than anyone has ever held for someone else in the whole world." He took a deep breath. "Do you love me too?"

"Yes." Kaoru said quickly, not giving herself a chance to hesitate.

His breath caught when he heard the words he had so longed to hear. Kenshin's eyes turned a deep amber color, the joy and possession in them was so great. For centuries he had been tortured with the absence of his soul mate and here she was, telling him that she loved him. He felt his heart expand and break through its shell to fill his whole chest.

"Do you trust me?"

"I…" Kaoru's eyes closed. "I don't know."

Kenshin rolled off Kaoru abruptly. "There can be no love without trust." He stated, feeling the feeling of exultation start to fade.

Kaoru suddenly felt tears pricking at her eyes as she sat up to face him. "Why did you have to tell her?!" she burst out, letting what truly bothered her show. She felt her heart constrict at his hard glance.

"What bothers you so much about Megumi?" Kenshin questioned. He lifted her chin so that her eyes were on his face.

Kaoru tried to shake his hand away but failed and was forced to remove it with her own hand. When she did so his fingers grasped hers and refused to let go. They held her in a steel grip and made it impossible for her to physically retreat from him again.

"I just…" she tried to remove his hand again in an attempt to divert him but could not sway him. "I just feel like…she is more sophisticated and …and I'm, uh, I'm just a little girl next to her. I wonder if you told her, because she is such a good listener and I'm…I'm just not." She finished lamely.

"Kaoru," he smiled to himself, relieved that it wasn't as bad as he had feared. "Kaoru, first of all, Megumi has been around me much longer, as a friend!" he added hastily. "I haven't had a chance to tell you about all this. I knew as soon as things quieted down I would, but it all blew up in my face before that could happen."

He stroked her cheek. "Furthermore, not only do I think you are more interesting than Megumi, I think that you are more beautiful than her too."

She looked down, embarrassed at his words. "I guess I could…I guess I could get used to…Its just that she frustrates me so much, but in time I think I could get used to that, you know."

Kenshin felt a mild annoyance at the fact that she _still_ couldn't fully accept his reasoning or his friend. "Kaoru, I _had _to tell someone how I felt. Megumi understands that night better than anyone else ever will." At her somewhat affronted look Kenshin frowned even more. "I had to let it out! Don't you understand? If I didn't tell someone _I would have found some way to kill myself."_

Kaoru flinched when he said that. The possibility of that ever happening truly scared her and she suddenly was unsure of how life could go on without him. She stroked the crossed scars on his cheek for a moment to comfort him. "Don't say that."

"It's true _koishii_…"

Kaoru shut her eyes for a moment to make herself put aside the horrible feeling that would engulf her if Kenshin died. Slowly, she leaned into him, closer and closer until their lips met in the most tender kiss yet, needing the sweet contact of his skin to hers.

"Awwwww!!! Busu! They are not talking!" Yahiko's voice screeched from the hall. Her student let out a cry of anger. "She's scarred me for _life_!!"

The sound of footsteps in the hall alerted them to more impending company and Kenshin quickly covered Kaoru's nakedness with his body. It was just in time too, because as soon as they were settled a disgusted yet curious Yahiko, an apologetic Sano, an aloof Megumi, an overjoyed Misao, and an annoyed Aoshi all walked in.

Megumi made the first remark. "Why does this scene look so familiar?"

Misao, who disapproved of the older woman's treatment of Kenshin and Kaoru, returned the volley. "Maybe that's because we just interrupted a scene identical to this in the room you share with Sano." Megumi had the grace to blush.

"You're supposed to be discussing your relationship." Chided Aoshi.

"We were!" Kaoru defended.

Megumi snorted. "Obviously not very well." To Kaoru's surprise, it was Sano who nudged her with his elbow in embarrassment. He was obviously feeling that he had to make it up to Kaoru for reacting violently against her.

Kaoru shifted under her blanket as an uncomfortable silence filled every corner of the room. Kenshin pulled her closer to his body. Aoshi frowned and Misao crossed her arms. Yahiko snickered behind his hands. Megumi blinked benignly.

It was Sano, however, who broke the spell over the room. He took two large steps forward and as he did so, and Kenshin pulled Kaoru as far away from him as he could in one swift move. Sano looked startled for a moment, and then he became even more shame faced.

He knelt on the floor before them and bowed his head. "Kamiya-san, I want to apologize for injuring you in any way. I reacted on an unknown instinct and I hope that you'll allow me to still care for you as a brother."

Kaoru was shocked. Sano had never looked so unhappy before, and he had _never ever_ addressed her as "Kamiya-san" before. Clearly, he was very torn up about what had happened.

For one terrible moment, Kaoru was tempted to look him in the eye, make him acknowledge her in a similar way, and then say, "No." She was so tempted, so wanted to pay him back, as all humans did when wrongs were done to him. Kaoru was ashamed of wanting this, of wanting to be ungracious and unforgiving. But she realized that it was the human burden to be almost naturally vindictive, and as she desperately wanted to shun that side of her and all humanity, she turned and felt forgiveness nestling in her body.

Unheeding of what she was wearing or of keeping Kenshin covered, Kaoru twisted the blanket out of her soul mate's grasp and tucked it under her armpits. She crawled forward to sit right in front of Sano and ignored Kenshin's warning growl. Impatiently she pulled Sano into an upright position and hit his forehead with the palm of her hand gently. "If you're my brother then you shouldn't have to apologize for one little thing."

Sano relaxed when she threw her arms around him and then tensed when he felt the bare skin of her back. He looked at Kenshin's rapidly darkening face and at Megumi's growing frown. "Uh…Jou-chan, maybe you should let go."

Kaoru looked up at Megumi. "If Sano's my brother then it also shouldn't be a problem when I hug him." She smiled smugly at the other woman's huff of annoyance.

Sano pried her arms off of him when the golden eyed man didn't ease up on his glare. "All the same Jou-chan, I think I'll just sit over here." He retreated to the other side of the room and wrapped his arms around Megumi. Kaoru moved backwards till Kenshin placed his hands on her waist and settled her back into the cocoon of his warmth.

Yahiko, still finding everything rather humorous, walked across the tension thick room and settled down on Kaoru's free side. He let her wrap an arm around him and grinned when Kenshin got smacked for his warning scowl.

Misao dragged Aoshi over to a wall that no one was occupying and sat against it pulling him down with her. Aoshi, her ever supportive husband, looked at the door with a sense of longing. "Perhaps everyone should be present for our discussions." Her bright eyes searched the room for a likely victim.

"I will ask a question and whoever I asked must answer." She continued and taped her chin as if in deep thought. Aoshi let out a minuscule sigh.

"Megumi, are you in love with Kenshin?" she asked.

The woman looked unsurprised that she'd been picked first. "No."

Misao demanded more sharply. "Have you ever been in love with him?"

"No." was the short reply.

Misao looked disappointed, but she turned to focus on Kenshin with renewed vigor. "Kenshin, same questions."

"You mean, have I ever been in love with myself?" his smooth, deep voice was amused and aimed to annoy Misao.

She flushed. "No! Are you in love with Megumi?"

Kenshin ignored the slight tensing that appeared in Kaoru's shoulders. "No.

He waited for Misao to begin to speak and then interrupted her purposely. "And I have never been in love with her either."

Misao glared at him and "hmphed". "Kaoru, can you accept that Megumi will most likely be living near and around you and Kenshin?" Kaoru nodded slowly. Misao was on a roll, so she kept going. "Sano, can you control yourself around others?"

Sano looked away momentarily as he spoke. "Of course I can. What do you take me for? That brat?"

Kaoru's hand slapped over Yahiko's mouth before he could retort. "It seems that everyone is done here. No one is going to attack anyone. You should all leave." She grinned up at Kenshin and he returned her exuberance.

Yahiko stood up with a huff. "Hey! I live with you Busu! Sometimes, I swear you…" Yahiko's voice faded away as he stalked down the hallway, ranting.

Sano grinned. "I live here too Jou-chan. Sorry to burst your bubble." He looked at Kenshin. "Guess you won't be getting anything sweet tonight." He waggled his eye brows as Megumi pinched him and then proceeded to push him out of the room.

Kaoru turned her eyes on Aoshi and his beaming wife. "You know, I just feel like our presence is needed a bit more. You have such a wonderful relationship, I can tell Kaoru-chan, but I feel that we should stay some more in this beautiful dojo." Misao announced with a huge, I-am-way-too-cute-and-or-bull-headed-to-say-no-to smile.

Aoshi put a restraining hand on his wife's shoulder. "Actually Kamiya, we were planning to stay here for the duration of our stay the whole time. We'll be down the hall." Kaoru watched in horror as he picked up his wife and stood up to stride after the others.

"Kenshin, make them leave!" she demanded.

He smiled. "Unfortunately, there is nothing I can do to them." He shot a glance at the futon. "But to you however…" He picked her up and went to the futon and lay her down. "I think you-"

He stopped speaking and looked about the room, the smile on his face fading. They could hear Sano saying Megumi's name down the hall before fading away. Yahiko was swearing at something and Misao was heard going, "Not again…"

Kaoru bit her lip and grasped Kenshin's arm, as if that one limb would fend off the fear that was suddenly chewing at her stomach. Kenshin was also looking concerned, and she knew it was affecting him too. "Kenshin, what's happening? Don't let it happen anata." she cried desperately as everything began to fade.

"I'm trying koishii, but I can't st…"

AN – so that was chapter eight for you all. I just feel so relieved that I'm finally back to posting this story for you all (and of course, acceptance from Mills College helps...). The whole time I couldn't, it was just constantly at the back of my mind, making me worry that you wouldn't want to read it when I finally came back.

So, LAST TIME'S POLL: favorite board game. Personally, I'm for Monopoly. Here are the results:

The Game of Life – 2  
Trivial Pursuit – 1  
Sequence -1  
Scrabble – 1  
Candyland – 1  
Lost Cities – 1  
Monopoly – 3  
Chess - 2  
Chinese checkers – 1

Thanks to the readers who reviewed chapter eight: **Raining insanity**, **scarylady**, **demon*feathers**,** kokoronagomu**, **miniwoo**, **Ken and Kao forever**, **Reigbashii**, **Yoru Asahi**, **BnK**, **Sweet Moments**, **Aly the Trickster**, **Celestial Raven**, **.**, **skenshingumi**, **JMai**, **bbzachariah**, **AutumnsFall**, **Cosmic-lover**, **cat**, **Shenhui**, **pooguy**, **kalownsu**, **smfan**, and **RedWingedAngel002.**

Also, thanks to everyone who reviewed the sad, depressing, most hated chapter – chapter eight: **Raining insanity**, **kokoronagomu**, **miniwoo**, **BnK **(you're so faithful...Thank you so much for sticking with me!), **kalownsu**, and **RedWingedAngel002**.

THIS MONTH'S POLL: what's your favorite type of chocolate: milk, dark, or white?


	10. ad alta

_Disclaimer: In no way, shape, or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except...for the mangas in my room...)or do I claim ownership of their stories (except...for the one you're reading right now...)_

_AN – I know, I know....another short chapter, another cliffhanger....but what can I say? The end is drawing near. Only two more chapters after this! Can you believe it? Only two more! I'm trying to make myself write an epilogue as well, but those things tend to be so hard for me...I think I'm abnormal that way..._

_Oh well. Enjoy this chapter and please people, no more flames about Kenshin crying! I will not change it! I find that reaction to be very realistic! Also, I know that there was some confusion as to what was happening at the end of the last chapter. Well, as it turns out, this funny business with Ad Alta is not yet done and gone, and it is the setting of this chapter._

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta reader, the **Kiyomi **half of **Banana Rum**, and to **whoever invented hot chocolate**; I've always thought this and I'm going to say it now: You are a god!_

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
****.:**chapter**.**nine**.**ad**.**alta**:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading:  
_"_The Planets, Op. 32: VII Neptune, the Mystic" by London_ _Symphony Orchestra, Sir Colin Davis and the Women of the London_ _Symphony Chorus_

"Fate has a way of circling back on a man, and taking him by surprise."  
- "Edward Bloom" in _Big Fish_

It was the bitter cold that dominated _Ad alta_. Wind that carried shards of glimmering ice in its hands froze everything. Magnificent statues of frozen water, whole waves caught in one slim moment, sat solid as stone on the ponds' surface. Their intricate details, the small grains of sand and shards of glass caught within, mesmerized all. In _Ad alta's_ terrible cruelty and harsh reality there was a beauty and an unexpected grace hidden in plain sight.

Kaoru could hardly breathe, she was so cold. The blood in her limbs felt like liquid nitrogen burning her flesh; every breath in through the nostrils to the lungs and every breath pushed out through her ice glazed lips was hardly tolerable. The feeling was inflamed as the air was so thin that her lungs worked rapidly, pulling and pushing out air faster than usual.

She placed a hand to her chest and went down to her knees. The hard frozen dirt was rough and uncomfortable, scraping her knees. Kenshin put his hand on her shoulders, concerned, but she could hardly feel them. Her flesh was frozen and her blood already felt sluggish and lazy, like ice crystals were clogging her veins.

Her finger grazed the sharp tip of a brittle blade of yellowed grass, the only one left of its kind. The dead plant shattered at the small touch and sliced open her finger. She hissed, thin air rushing past her chattering teeth as blood welled to the surface. It was frozen solid within seconds, slivers of ice glinting off the dark liquid in the weak, pale yellow sun.

Kaoru stared at her would disjointedly, unable to feel the small digit. Her eyes traveled the landscape morosely, noting the frozen and twisted trees; how their bark was cracked and diseased. The solid ponds with golden fish wriggling around in tiny traps of ice, their eyes panicked.

She moved slowly over to the nearest pond, unheeding of the voices of Kenshin and Sano, who were expressing their displeasure at this. Kaoru planted her hands on the ice, not noticing that the ragged edges of the surface made little cuts on her palms. She stared down at the little fish, trapped in the ice underneath her hands. The creature was struggling madly, its beady black eyes darting back and forth. The golden and copper scales, stretched over twitching and rolling muscles, were shinning ripples under the ice, rolling over its body smoothly, one after another.

Her eyes locked onto those of the little golden fish. Her vision tunneled till that was all she saw. She felt its panic and despondency and pure desire to be free. She recognized those feelings inside herself, cultivated by the landscape around her. They were both trapped in an icy place, an icy cage. She saw herself in the fish. She became aware of how the wind punished her and felt akin to the fish, being punished by the ice.

She wanted to be warm and all tangled up in Kenshin on their futon.

She wanted to be sitting in her kitchen, munching on rice balls and laughing with her friends.

She didn't want to be in _Ad alta_.

She didn't want to be so cold or to feel the blood pounding in her ears.

She didn't want to be numb or to be this scared.

She didn't want to feel the pressure on her skin.

She didn't want to be there.

'I don't want to be here…'

Kaoru gave a great cry of frustration and pulled one arm up high. She brought it down with awesome force, intending to shatter the ice and free the helpless golden fish. Her fist was almost to its target. Her fingers tingled in anticipation of impact. She had almost completed her goal…

…when Kenshin's warm hand caught hers. He gathered her entire body against his frame and sheltered her from the biting wind. "No koishii." His voice rumbled through her, finally making contact with her brain. "Don't let this hell drive you insane. You're stronger than this Kaoru! You're stronger than this…" his lips were leaving burning marks underneath her skin, fires that scorched the cold where he had placed a kiss.

"Yes. If what I've seen is any indication, my home shouldn't be impossible for you to bear." The voice was deep and rich, cultured over thousands of years.

Kenshin let Kaoru turn around in his arms to view the speaker. The man was very tall, towering over even Sano, who stood a few feet away with a seemingly unaffected Megumi. Although his thick hair was a silver gray to match the glassy, vicious landscape around them, his arms were thick and firm with un-aged muscles and the skin around his eyes was unmarked by lines. He wore the strange, tight breeches of Europeans of old and his arms were left bare. He seemed unaffected by the astounding ferocity of the cold.

"Surely my abode isn't too terrible?" Yes, this was Loki. His impressive appearance marked him more than mortal and his patronizing tone of voice was unmistakable.

Kenshin pulled Kaoru to her feet, but still kept her flush against his body. "Why have you brought us here Loki?" Kenshin demanded, his voice as harsh as the wind even as his hands gently rubbed her arms to produce more warmth.

The god shrugged, but Kenshin didn't let him answer right away. "I have done it. I've found my woman and she has accepted me. There's nothing you can do Loki! I am out of your service forever!" There was fierce pride that shone through in the word forever, and the echo of freedom could be heard in it.

To Kaoru's eyes, Loki didn't seem at all affected by Kenshin's demands, though many mortal men would have fallen in defeat. But then again, Loki was anything but mortal. She tried to open her mouth quickly, intending to speak up. But the ice swathed air that hit her tongue, still warm from its shelter in her mouth, was shocked into submission. It took her a moment to recover, and even then she was reluctant to try again.

"Leave him alone!" she shouted as best she could at the god, still determined to defend her Battousai.

Loki looked at her appraisingly, his eyes narrowing. He strode forward through the gale to meet them, and the energy that radiated off him was so violent and reminiscent of a volcano that Kaoru's whole body was soon burning up. "Why should I do that mortal?" he boomed.

The comfort of Kenshin's body tucked against hers kept her courage from flagging. "Everything that was required of him and of me is done."

"When did you accept him mortal? Tell me as accurately as you can." Kenshin bristled as Loki's patronizing tone, unhappy with the treatment of his mate, more than unhappy with the entire situation.

Kaoru frowned, counting back in a mental estimation to the time of her last dream. It was directly after that that she'd accepted him. "Mmm…it was about a day ago."

Loki frowned at her answer, and tapped his chin in thought as he stared at him. It was a very un-god like thing to do, and suggested a tarnished life as a mortal that had long since passed. His contemplation was strained, and it was obvious to all. Megumi, Sano, Aoshi, Misao, and Yahiko, who'd all lain dormant so far, were observing him conspicuously, trying to discern any sign of dissent. Megumi edged closer to the man who'd sentenced her to time in _Ad alta_, pulling Sano closer as well in his need to protect her.

Although Kaoru knew that the figure she'd named a moment ago was accurate, it was still strange for her to realize that only a day ago, she'd brought Kenshin out of _Ad alta_ for good. Or…what she'd thought was for good.

To think that so much had happened so quickly. Even before that, Kenshin's "courtship" of her had been a whirlwind one. That made no difference when concerning the depth of their connection though. Their emotions had ridden on highs and swam under lows, but they'd come together again after all. She'd thought it before, but now it was more true than ever that Kaoru had no idea what life would be like without him in it.

And now that they were bonded, connected, one being…well, life would cease without him.

"Well mortal, you must understand." Loki started without anymore hesitation.

"Battousai's time in _Ad alta_ ended two days ago. He belongs to _Ad infinitum_ now."

_AN – Ah! Now I've really got your attention. Hopefully you'll all stay salivating for this next month of February. Its not coincidence that I'm being merciful and posting this chapter on the shortest month...Nah...I'm kidding, it really was a coincidence._

LAST MONTH'S POLL: dark chocolate, milk chocolate, or white chocolate?

Dark chocolate – 6 (with various additions like Hazelnuts, Almonds, Orange, etc...)  
Milk Chocolate – 8  
White Chocolate – 3

And Milk Chocolate for ze win!!!!!!!!!!! YAY! For awhile there I was worried, Dark chocolate was putting up quite a fight. But good old Milk won out. My favorite!

Thanks to all those who reviewed: **kokoronagomu**, **cherrystraw**, **cat**, **Ken and Kao forever**, **miniwoo**, **Cosmic-lover**, **Reignashii**, **LordRandallsLady** (curious – who is Lord Randall? ^_*), **BnK**, **SakuraDreamHeart**, **inuyashaswifeforlifeonly** (wouldn't you want all of that InuYasha yumminess for more than one lifetime?), **bbzachariah**, **Kao-Misao1728**, **JadeEye**, **Otaku's Moon**, **Dreatra**, and **smfan**. Thank you all so much – it seems you all know that the way to a writer's heart is through her love of reviews!

THIS MONTHS POLL: Okay guys, just tell me what the weather is like where you are. Its Jan/Feb and we've got blue skies, 60s and 70s, and an early spring. How bizarre is that? The trees are even starting to bloom early!


	11. revelation

_Disclaimer: In no way, shape, or form do I own Rurouni Kenshin (except...for the mangas in my room...) or do I claim ownership of their stories (except...for the one you're reading right now...) This is a non-profit endeavor._

_AN – YAY! Its March! March is my absolute favorite month! My birthday is March 30th , so I'm totally psyched! So you guys will get a chapter two days after I turn another entire year older! Woot!_

_Okay, so, this chapter is one that I was so confident about. And then you guys trashed the last chapter that I tried to put a lot of emotion into (hintmaletearshint). And now, I'm not so confident. In this one I tried to pour so much into. I lost my father at age eleven, and I really tried to reveal how I feel about his death through Kaoru and her feelings for her father. So...hopefully you don't hate it..._

_Shameless Plug: My TDK story, "Big Smile Please". Its a bunch of loosely connected shorts dealing with the relationship of Heath Ledger's Joker and what might be his last victim. They are sporadically written though, and there isn't a true plot. Yet. All the same, I'd really like you all to review and tell me what you think. Thanks!_

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta-reader, the **Kiyomi** half of **Banana Rum**, and to my wonderful English teacher, **Mrs. T.**, for caring so much about this lonely student of hers._

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
****.:**Chapter**.**Ten**.Revelation:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading:  
_"_Remember Me" by Josh Groban  
_"_Losing Me (Perdido en Ti)" - Diego_

"Nothing that grieves us can be called little: by the eternal laws of proportion a child's loss of a doll and a king's loss of a crown are events of the same size…"

-Mark Twain.

Kaoru's shocked gasp was the only sound in _Ad alta_ to reply to Loki's statement. The wind, so baleful and moaning before, cut short its screams for a moment to let her sound pass to the ears of the others. Kenshin, Megumi, Sano, Aoshi, Misao, Yahiko. Their faces all reflected the shock that Kaoru experienced. Megumi and Aoshi's eyes widened in horror, while Sano and Misao, though less comprehending of how this destroyed Kenshin, looked completely disgusted by this turn of events. Yahiko, who knew even less than the previous two, based the intensity of his emotions on how the others reacted.

Beneath Kaoru's hands Kenshin's muscles grew tense and stiff as bone, and the scar on his face stood out in even starker relief against his suddenly pale skin. He began to shake with rage, the little, yet encompassing movements jumping up to Kaoru's fingers and body to wake her from her shock. "Liar!" Kenshin bellowed. He lunged forward into Loki's face, furious, but still he kept one hand entwined with Kaoru's. He was not going to let go of her.

The wind in the iced trees and the flailing of the frozen fish stopped. The whole of _Ad alta_ became silent throughout, while the echoes of the cries of the wind sounded more and more like that of the fallen. There were no movements in Ad alta as Loki drew himself up. "This is no lie!" the god roared back, extremely insulted at the taint that put on his "integrity".

Somehow, Kenshin managed to sound even louder. "No! Lies! If this were true you would have claimed me two days ago! You cannot take me from her now!" His grip was getting painful in his protectiveness.

Loki seemed to settle himself then, drawing all his energy into his corporeal form. And although he seemed less angry, he was all the more frightening. His eyes had a hard edged quality, containing the sharpness and the dangerous allure of diamonds. One hand waved about in a controlled but seemingly careless display. "Ah, yes, I can. And I will. I was foolish and neglected to collect you Battousai. Perhaps I thought that my loyal vassal would return on his own...But that is the only reason you have had this time with your woman."

Kenshin's hair and skin seemed to grow brighter as the force of his anger built upon itself and grew and grew. "You forgot to 'collect me'?"

The god placed his hands on Kenshin's straining shoulders, his face livid. "I created you Battousai," he growled, spitting out the nickname. "Do not overestimate your power here."

For one moment forever to be clear in Kaoru's mind, Battousai sagged and his eyes closed like the dead. Then Kenshin jerked back and stumbled into Kaoru. He was suddenly gasping for breath, like Loki had physically drained him of energy and life. He leaned on Kaoru for support; his whole body was trembling still, but this time it was from a combination of fury and exhaustion. "No…" he gasped out.

"Like it or not, there is nothing you can do." Loki flashed his teeth in what should have been a smile, but came across like a wolf baring his teeth. His eyes followed the lines of the muscles in Kenshin's body and then those of the curves of Kaoru's. How she clung to him and yet supported him. How the great manslayer let her do this. He noticed how her eyes flashed with the need to defend her mate. How she drew comfort from the simple proximity of his flesh.

Loki observed all this, noted it painstakingly in his mind, and pieced something, some conclusion together. His riffle through her mind produced more fodder for his machinations. "You can do nothing." He murmured, and then louder. "But there is you something you, woman, can do."

Kaoru swung her gaze to meet Loki's for the first time. Her eyes narrowed in suspicion at the glummer of trickery in the god's face. Kenshin's attention was also caught, and like a fish on a hook he struggled to break free of what was holding him still and in place.

"What would you require of me?" Kaoru asked slowly, as desperate as Kenshin to free them all of the trap.

Loki shrugged, as if it was no big deal, but one could tell it was in his eyes. "I would show you some images, add depth to your perception. Then I would ask you a question, and you would answer it."

"And then what?" Sano questioned forcefully. His face was furrowed in a frown as he walked up to stand by Kaoru. "What happens after she answers?"

"That depends on her answer." The god smirked, a perfect display of his corruption.

Yahiko bounded forward and like a wave, the others followed to back Kenshin and Kaoru. "That's not fair! You can't do that!" he exclaimed, eyeing the shaking Battousai.

Loki smiled, much like a snake baring its fangs. "That, little boy, depends on her answer at this moment."

"You can't expect us to go w-"

Loki silenced Misao's outburst with a glare that was unperturbed when Aoshi moved in front of his wife and placed his hand on his kodachis. When Aoshi was the first to look away, Loki turned his attentions back to Kaoru. "Do you agree mortal?"

Kaour breathed in deeply and squeezed Kenshin's shoulders. His eyes were a golden ocean of fury and distrust. "You don't need to do this koishii. There is _always_ another way." He told her, brushing his lips over hers.

Kaoru smiled at him, conveying her affections and love, her worry for him and the future. "This is the only way." She turned away from him with a steadying sigh. "I'm ready." She told Loki.

The god nodded gravely. "Your bravery is inspiring mortal. Now instruct your companions to stand away from you." When the two couples, Kenshin, and Yahiko hesitated to do so, Loki's eyes narrowed. "Move! Now!"

When Kaoru finally stood alone before him, Loki crooked a finger at empty space across from them. "Come mortal, they will show you where you are to stand."

Summoned from their dusty halls, the immortals from Ad infinitum slowly appeared in their garish, ruined finery. A choked sound came from Megumi as she watched those desperate friends come closer. Every single one of them that had lined the edge of that corridor stood together, united, in front of Loki. Tiny spiders scurried from their little hiding places as the people moved, sending waves of arachnids across the frozen water. There in the front stood the man who had spoken to her, the place where she had touched still clear in the white powder covering him.

They led her over without a touch to the edge of the frozen pond she'd knelt at earlier. When she glanced down the little fish was where she'd left it. But this time there was something different about it. The brightly shinning scales were taking on a deadly silver gray taint. It appeared to Kaoru that mercury had slipped into its veins and was draining the vibrancy of its color. Its flexible body hardly twitched as its mouth gaped open.

It was dying…

Loki startled her out of her trance with his words. "Walk across the pond, mortal, and stand before the wave."

Kaoru took a step onto the ice and felt the frigidity of it seep into her feet. She looked back at her family, back on the granite like ground, and felt very much like the fish. She padded across the ice to the huge wave, frozen solid and glittering, and prayed to escape her own cage of ice.

The surface of the wave seemed polished and glassy, instead of rough and natural as something left out in the wind and rain would be. The tiny grains of sand in the ice glittered, slightly abrading her dead fingers as the ice melted under the force of her minimal body heat.

She stared into the ice and saw her own image. Her face looked back, an overflowing plain, a map upon which a story had been acted out. It was all there, everything and nothing had escaped the great storyteller named destiny from scrawling it on her face. And then her visage twisted and became distorted, not her own and eerie, and the images it became absorbed her, drew her in, enveloped her. Even _Ad alta _faded away as she was drawn into the vision world.

_She emerged into a forest with murky, half sunlight that signaled the early twilight. Kaoru pushed through several bushes, ignoring the scratches they left on her legs, to stand by an old sage of a tree. _

_A pathway ran through the forest in front of her, rough with scattered stones but firm and hard from years of use. She drew behind the tree when she heard someone pad down the path, a woman. Kaoru was startled to recognize the woman as Megumi. Megumi! Kaoru's stomach sank with the weight of her dread. She knew what was going to happen. _

_There was a brief flash of icy cold in her body, reminiscent of Ad alta, when someone walked through her. Badly cropped, dark red hair. Amber eyes not quite how she remembered them. A taught body straining with muscles. The first Kenshin. Not yet Battousai, but close. _

_The memory of Megumi frowned and halted momentarily. She tried to move around Kenshin but he blocked her. Her mouth opened and moved, the words she spoke lost to her own ears._ _Kenshin responded to Megumi with words just as soundless, and a hard edged baring of teeth. Even though the forest, vast and all encompassing, volunteered sounds of a usual nature, the two spectral people were completely silent. _

_Kaoru shrieked when Kenshin lunged at Megumi, but no birds were startled from the tall, watchful trees. They went down in a tangle of limbs, but Kenshin soon gained dominance. Megumi was pushed on her back with her head pressed against a stone in the dirt. Her body was thrashing and she was obviously screaming terribly. Her fingers and nails raked over Kenshin's arms viciously, from shoulder to wrist. He snarled and slapped her._

_He placed his hands around Megumi's neck and Kaoru thought, for just one moment, that she saw a flash of anguish in his eyes. But it was ruthlessly killed before it could truly manifest. The silence was deafening as Kaoru began to step toward the two. Kenshin was beginning to bash Megumi's head into the stone. The woman's face was turning purple from lack of air and she was grasping at the fingers on her throat. _

_Not able to stop herself, Kaoru stepped onto the path and almost reached out to stop the murder. The silence banged on her ears with the force of what she was witnessing. It was unnatural, what should have been filled with screams cut off on a final note was entirely empty. Faces drifted up before her glazed eyes as she watched, disassociated from their bodies. Faces and faces that broke in two of burst apart in her mind's eye. Victims, victims, victims! All silenced by two glowing amber eyes behind._

_Kaoru desperately did not want to see Kenshin kill. She didn't want to see the gushing blood from Megumi's head. She didn't want to hear the silence of imagine the screams. The adrenaline burned through her as she watched and itched to help. Blood pounded through her ears like the rapid flow of a river called out to by the sea, made her head ache. She didn't want it!_

_Unable to take it, Kaoru clapped her hands over her ears, shut her eyes, and screamed…_

…_Kaoru opened her eyes again when she realized that she could no longer feel the rough dirt beneath her feet. She looked down at the grass now tickling her ankles with trepidation. She jumped when a body appeared at her feet and the blood soaked the grass and her feet. _

_A scream rose up in her throat again, but she clapped her hands over her mouth and tamped down on it. Kaoru backed away in horror as the head lolled away from the body in a macabre greeting. The flames that burned half of the town before her cast the body in shadows and shot the moon with a painfully intense orange. _

_Grateful for the cloaking shadows on the body, Kaoru inched around it, grimacing at the feel of drying blood between her toes. In the distance she could clearly see flames licking the buildings of Kyoto_ _and was startled to realize that she hadn't noticed its light and warmth till that moment. The fire was rampant with power and fuel, and it silhouetted the warriors that fought for the city. Out where she was standing there were wide swaths of clear space, but the closer one got to the fire and the buildings, the thicker the violence got. _

_Kaoru began to withdraw back into the forest behind her, disgusted by the violence and confused as to why the god was showing her this. She stumbled through the brush and weaved through the tall, thin bamboos stalks, searching for her purpose in this past. She slipped through two trees and into the edge of a small clearing. The open space was much smaller than what was the prelude to the forest. Here the grass was thick and tall from less frequent traffic. But it was a pale, pale green from lack of sun and nutrients. Here she was so close to the opponents facing each other before her that she could clearly identify the combatants. _

_Her Battousai, Kenshin, and her father, Kamiya Koshijiro._

_She staggered and clutched her middle in the shock of seeing her dead father standing. Koshijiro was panting hard and his skin was glistening with sweat. Overcome with the desire to touch him, hug him, know him, she started to walk toward him. Every few steps she stopped, afraid to touch him all the same and find him real, and know that the past few years of her life had been wrong. _

_He was so close to her that she could almost remember how it had felt to hug him, and that sensation itched and festered under her skin. He pulled his katana up in a fighting stance, and Kaoru felt tears tremble upon the edge of falling as she remembered preparing the sword for his departure. He was so close…_

_Kaoru looked over at Kenshin, the Battousai, her mate. Or at least, the man who would become her mate. He seemed unruffled and calm. His hair, so vibrant and bright, was bound up in a high ponytail. His clothes were dark and pulled closer to his body than the ones she'd seen him wear. _

_His stance was a battoujutsu, and Kaoru felt a sinking feeling yet again. She knew what would happen in this place too. Kaoru lunged forward as Kenshin and her father charged each other. She went for the blade, all instincts screaming to save her family. _

_Her flesh, not being corporeal in that reality, went straight through the metal and Battousai's arm without effect. Kenshin jerked back a fraction when he felt a freezing cold envelope his arm for a fleeting second; instead of cleaving his opponent in two, his blade cut open a large gash in the other man's stomach. _

_Kaoru watched in horror as her father collapsed to the ground, his hands tight over her mouth. A grainy photograph fell from Koshijiro's gi and floated to the ground. Battousai, his eyes narrowed in suspicious, advanced on the man, sword held at the ready. Kaoru could see the eerie quality of Battousai's gait as her father had said in his letter. _

_Battousai knelt down and picked up the picture, shaking a bit of dust off of it. He straightened, and his hand shook from the force of his emotions. A bit of wind that carried the scent of fire and debris and destruction picked at the end of his red ponytail as his eyes changed. The pupils downsized and the irises clouded to a vibrant and dangerous dark purple. _

_He leaned in to whisper words into her father's ear, and Kaoru's stomach clenched in anticipation at the sight of him, knowing what he was saying. This was the beginning of it all! _

_Kaoru's terror and sorrow returned in full force as Battousai vanished into the tree behind her. All that she was left to look at was her father, groaning. Clutching his stomach. Bleeding and dying before her eyes. 'This is a nightmare! This is a punishment! This…this…I…' Her throat swelled shut with untold anguish when her own thoughts could not convey truthfully the depth of her pain, when she realized that her father's prolonged death was her doing. _

_If only she hadn't run forward and passed through Battousai… He wouldn't have pulled back at the last second. Koshijiro would have been cleaved in two, his death instant and painless and would not be long enough to allow him time to ponder his own death. Instead, she had charged him to linger with his mortal coil, destroyed as it was. _

_Tears dripped from her eyes and gave the vision of the past around her a reality that did not exist in the real world. The knowledge that she had caused this even when she hadn't physically been there in the Bakumatsu and was only seeing it through the god made her head spin and the tears come faster. If only she hadn't still been a stupid, stupid little girl who thought she could save her dead father…_

_The pages of destiny twisted around her as she sunk to the ground. Her legs trembled beneath her even as they rested on the earth. Her heart broke in twain, shattered, was ground to anguished dust, the state of one who had died, but not yet left. _

_The earth of the vision gaped open beneath her, swallowing what was left of her and her father's moan into a great yawning hole…_

AN – (winces) So how was it? Alert! Next month will be the LAST chapter, unless fate intervenes and a whole new subplot suddenly appears on my computer screen...

LAST MONTH'S POLL: What is the weather like?  
- (Texas) 70's, Spring like atmosphere  
- Warm one day, snowing the next  
- Mid 40s and freezing, snow storms expected.  
- 30s (Unusually warm? That's freezing for me!)  
- "hella cold in the mornings and nights and hot in the afternoons"  
- Very cold  
- cold with warm breezes  
- (Florida) 30s at night, sunny or not so sunny in the daytime  
- cold rainy/snowy  
- sunny and warm  
- (Oregon) cold with mixed rain and snow

Over here, the week after I posted that chapter it got pretty rainy and cold for awhile, like fate was biting me in the butt. I live in California, specifically the Bay Area, one of the coolest places to live in the world!

And finally, to my readers: **bbzachariah** (Ad Infinitum is like Ad alta, except you can never, ever leave it. The people in the hallway of Kaoru's dream in Chapter Four are in Ad Infinitum.), **smfan,** **kokoronagomu**, **miniwoo**, **Reignashii**, **Dreatra**, **Cosmic-lover**, **mallory**, **Kao-Misao1728** (Cheap?! My chapter was cheap?!?!?!?!?!), **Otaku's Moon**, **Ryouya-Kyuuketsuki**, and **chippyshero**. Also to **BnK** , whose question I am about to answer.

Q: _"Just curious but will you have another story after this, or are you going to take a break from writing for awhile?"  
_A: Yes, I do have another Rurouni Kenshin story in the works. Woot! HOWEVER, it is in it's rudimentary stages and there isn't much written. On the other hand, I WILL be posting the first chapter of my Dark Knight, Joker/OFC story next month. The chapters generally aren't as long as these are, and the style is different from what I usually do, as the narrative is in First Person. But hopefully, a lot of you will be able to transfer over to that story and read and review that one too.

This is the synopsis: Jack Napier and his wife Ellie love each other very much. They live a normal life. Until....one day, Jack gets in too deep with the sharks, and he changes. And Ellie, well, she leaves. In his rage and pain, Jack turned into something...else. And now, two years later, he wants her back.

So....read it!

THIS MONTH'S POLL: For those of you who have read Anne Bishop's _Blood Jewels Trilogy_ (_Daughter of the Blood_, etc....), who do you think is sexier: Daemon, Lucivar, Saetan, Andulvar, Prothvar, or Mephis?


	12. acceptance

_This author is humbly apologizing for being a day late. This author is truly sorry. But this author would also like to remind her benevolent readers that it was__ only __a day late. Not three weeks late. Also, this author would like to remind her benevolent readers that if they are not nice and understanding and forgiving, they can kiss an epilogue goodbye. This author would also like to stop talking like she's Rurouni Kenshin, and referring to herself in third person. Please._

_Anyway, LAST chapter! Can you believe it? This is the end! Its actually been an entire year since I started posting this story on . Wow. Time flies when you're having fun._

_Shameless plug: Check out my brand new JOKER story, titled, "Honey I'm Home". Its about Ellie Napier, who left her husband two years ago. Whose just been kidnapped by the psychopath Joker. Who acts like she should remember him. Hmmm…._

_Dedicated to my made-of-awesome beta reader, the __**Kiyomi**__ half of __**Banana Rum**__, and __**to Lily**__, for telling me to stay away from the so-called "drugs", also known as aspirin, that our other friend, Eva, dispenses quite judiciously, while taking them for "headaches" herself. Love ya!_

**.:**These**.**Dreams**:.  
****.:**chapter**.**eleven**.**acceptance**:.**

_Song(s) to Listen to While Reading: "I Think We're Alone Now" by Tommy James & The Shondells and "Still Loving You" by Scorpions_

"Here must all distrust be left behind; all cowardice must be ended."  
- "The Divine Comedy: The Inferno, Canto III, Lines 14-15" , Dante.

The visions faded away from her as they had come – wisps of past and matter and nothingness - and left her on her knees on the ice, with the Lost people already fading away. Kaoru wept there, blatantly and openly, tears shattering as they collided with the ice, without care to the sight she must have presented. A great commotion reached her ears, shouting and struggling. She vaguely pushed it from her consciousness. And there was a sudden touch of flesh to her flesh.

Kenshin.

Thoughtlessly, Kaoru flung herself into his arms and pressed her nose into his neck as she drenched him in her tears.

Battousai.

The memory of her father flashed and she struggled to pull away while Kenshin held her close, feeling torn in two. How could she love Kenshin, when he had done such a thing? How could she trust him? Lie beside him at night? Die with him in old age?

Kenshin took her hand and pulled her to the edge of the ice where she was pounced upon by her friends. Sano pulled her into his arms and this time Kaoru didn't pull away. This man hadn't killed before. He could not hurt her. He was safe.

Even Megumi tended to her then, as Misao stroked her hair, Aoshi fended off Loki, and Yahiko kept promising never to call her "Busu" again in an attempt to raise her spirits. Their support left her feeling weak and unworthy, with guilt biting at her skin. "What happened Kaoru?" Misao asked softly, turning Kaoru's face away from Sano's chest.

Kaoru pulled her tears back long enough to choke out, "I killed him! I did it! I did it!" Then everything came back to her full force and she collapsed into Misao's arms. The smaller girl looked startled at the sudden contact but didn't shy away from her new duty.

"My father…I killed…he died…"

Megumi was the first to translate Kaoru's broken sentences correctly. "What do you mean you saw your father die?" She questioned softly, taking one of Kaoru's hands.

The blue eyed, crying woman ignored the question and straightened, half pulling away from Misao. There was a wound in her eyes, bleeding and oozing, that was undeniable as she looked at Kenshin. "You. You did it too. You did it too!" a sudden fury and pain made her scream at Kenshin, "You did it too! How could you?!"

Kenshin caught Kaoru as she launched her self at him, and cradled her to his chest even as she tried to beat him with her fists. "Koishii…quiet yourself koishii…give your pain to me." he whispered to her, covertly bringing strands of her hair to his face to ensure that she had actually returned from Loki's trial safely. The smell of her did much to calm his body and the strand's silky texture was beautiful against his scarred cheek.

"Why did you do it?" she accused into his shoulder.

"I didn't know he was yours. I didn't know he was yours koishii." Kenshin responded to her, having some otherworldly knowledge of what she accused him of. His thin fingers brushed away bits of ice that nestled into her skin and hair.

She shivered at this, from the brush of his fingers, the words he was telling her, the gray eyes upon her back. "Battousai…" Kaoru murmured, once again using his other name to put distance between them.

He didn't let her finish, didn't allow her to, didn't want her to. He caught up her chin with his big hand and brought her face to his. His lips muffled her protests, her shame, and her fear, till they all disappeared. Kenshin was powerful and tender when he kissed her, when he slid into her mouth. He drew her in closer with a hand at the small of her back and traced the lines of her teeth with his tongue.

Kaoru couldn't help but to fall into the kiss, moaning when he clutched her tighter. The feel of his other hand clutching at the back of her head desperately made her kiss him back with even more verve. His lips were exactly as she had remembered them then, the very ones she had once searched for in a line of strangers...

They were comforting and promised a million lifetimes together, and they were hers. Still hers, in fact, when the two broke away. Their lips parted and their bodies followed but their lives stayed entwined. Kaoru knew her lips were red and pouting, and she could clearly feel the blood beating underneath the thin skin there. Her body felt smashed from being pressed against the hard muscles of the Battousai and her hair felt uncontrollably mussed from his hands.

Just as there was no more contact between any of their skin, Kenshin drew her in close by the chin again, and Kaoru almost found herself waiting for another kiss. "I have told you before koishii, that is not my name to you. You are to call me Kenshin." He brushed a finger down her nose and across her lips and leaned toward her.

He placed another soft kiss on her lips, pulled her into his arms, and then turned to face Loki, but kept himself between the person he loved the most and the person he hated the most. His eyes were cold and hard and malicious when he eyed the god. "You will ask her your question and then we will leave." He stated, leaving no room for argument.

Loki didn't try to argue. When he gestured for Kaoru to come stand by him again there was a slight smile on his face, arrogant, as if he already knew the outcome of her answer. "Come here woman." He commanded, looking on with satisfaction as she stepped away from Kenshin.

Kaoru looked back at Kenshin as she walked away from him and prayed that every step that distanced her from him wouldn't feed the fledgling resentment that brewed within her. "I'll answer your question." She told him without pretense.

Loki turned so that their bodies were parallel and went to put his hands on her shoulders, as if to dramatize the moment, but then pulled himself back at the last second. "Battousai, Himura Kenshin, is standing not ten feet from you. He killed your father, Kamiya Koshijiro, frightened you, and deceived you. Do you trust him?"

The question hit Kaoru like a samurai did their opponent, with all its might. This was the question that had hung unspoken between them for what seemed like forever. It was a cancerous cyst that had leeched onto their relationship and hadn't let go, and although they had grown closer, it still prevented a complete melding of souls.

_All that she was left to look at was her father, groaning. Clutching his stomach. Bleeding and dying before her eyes…_

There was passion between them, a physical lusting and compatibility that was stronger and more lasting than Kaoru had ever before thought possible between two people. There was jealousy, possessiveness, affection, familiarity, comfort, remorse, compassion, desire, yearning. Was there distrust? Kaoru couldn't be sure. The emotion had slipped out of her heart and started to bloom when Megumi's story came out, but Kenshin's heartfelt regret had killed it.

Was there trust? There was love, but surely there was such a thing as love without trust. Not a very happy notion, but a realistic one all the same. Kaoru bit her lip with uncertainty and squeezed her eyes shut, hoping this would help her concentration. She'd already made the decision deep inside, and hadn't realized it before then. Now she knew it was there, she was just having trouble accessing it.

"Decide woman." Loki said, sounding impatient.

"Koishi…" Kenshin's voice drifted over, less than a whisper.

"_A gift koishii…"_

"_Do not cry koishii…"_

"_Free me koishii, and I will never leave you…"_

"_You have freed me koishii. Now you must accept me…"_

Her memories echoed the word, bringing forth all the times when he had called her the endearment. All the times he had been sincere and loving. Protective. Happy to be with her.

_The earth of the vision gaped open beneath her, swallowing what was left of her and her father's moan into a great yawning hole…_

"No." she mouthed silently, trying to shut away that memory. It was still like a brand being pressed into her flesh, the cause of agony and censure of her soul. Again the word bubbled up into her head.

koishiiKoishiiKOISHII_koishii_**koishii**koishii**KOISHII**_**koishii**_Koishii…the word sounded in her ear over and over, overlapping and drowning out and silencing, enveloping and screaming and murmuring. Koishii**koishii **KOISHII_koi-_ Cut off in midway, another reminiscent sound interrupted.

"_I swear to you Kaoru, you are the only one I love. I hold more love for you than anyone has ever held for someone else in the whole world." He took a deep breath. "Do you love me too?"_

Click – it came together. The reunion of two halves, the mending of a shattered life, like gluing together pottery. "Yes." Kaoru said, out loud this time. "Yes." She told Loki with more finality. "I do trust him. I love him. I would sacrifice my life for him."

A grin spread across her face, a euphoric feeling erupting from every pore and cell of her body. "Yes!" she boomed at the god.

Kenshin caught her in his arms again, welcomed her with his kisses. The strange feeling on his face was tears. Crying. He was crying with relief, bits of moisture trekking down his cheeks and chin to slid over his neck and into her hair. As tiny as they were, Kaoru felt every single one of them as they hit her scalp. She looked up into his eyes. "Don't cry anata."

"I was so worried that you wouldn't want me anymore."

"I am yours forever and I will never leave you." She recited, grinning up at him. His only response was to pull her into another hug.

On the opposite side of the group, Loki was swelling with even more anger. "You trust him? You love him?" he questioned Kaoru incredulously.

She looked over her shoulder at him. "Yes. I do, and you can't change that."

The god's eyes turned a furious red, glowing and seething with his fury. His plans had been destroyed! Here he had hoped to keep his greatest warrior, his greatest creation, and this little bitch of a mortal had stolen him away!

"You cannot disobey me like this Battousai!" he screamed in rage, irrational in his turbulent emotions.

Kenshin eyed him coolly. "I have done all you've asked. Let me be."

Loki grinned cruelly, as if an idea had just appeared in front of him. He put one arm out, the unblemished back of his hand facing the clouded sky. His arm turned over to bare his palm and his vulnerable wrist. One finger lifted up and crooked, and at this gesture, Kaoru begin to move away from Kenshin.

Without her consent she was dragged away, even thought her feet desperately tried to dig into the ice and her hands clutched at Kenshin's gi. She screamed in fear, in uncertainty, a wail that called for Kenshin to save her.

"Go into _Ad infinitum_ Battousai." Loki demanded. "Go or find your woman to be a lifeless mound of flesh." He let out a noise, half laugh half snarl, that went to the very heart of both Kenshin and Kaoru's terror.

Kenshin surged forward as Loki's hands landed on Kaoru's shoulders. Her eyes went wide and she screamed again, this time with the excruciating pain of the touch. Forcibly, Loki began to draw out her life force, her ki, the energy that kept her body, mind, and soul from terrible entropy.

Her eyes leaked thousands of tears with the effort it took to keep them open and on Kenshin. His face was desperate to reach her. Even his god like speed was not fast enough in his eyes. His hands stretched…stretched to touch her.

The amber of his eyes had then faded away into pure effort, energy, and hate. Just as her strength was starting to flag his hand grabbed her arm, and he pulled, not just physically, but mentally. And his effort was joined upon by that of everyone else.

Megumi also ran forward, ironically (after all the trouble she'd caused) the first one to be able to provide help. Her long nailed fingers latched onto Loki's scalp and he yelped when they dug in. Aoshi and Misao each grabbed onto one of Loki's arms, despite the danger it presented them, and tugged on his elbows. Yahiko grasped onto the god's waist, trying to drag Loki away and Sano went for Loki's neck, simultaneously taking out his aggression for the god and helping Megumi to reach the divine one's head.

Their minds joined together as a collective force, a massive bull breaking away from the bonds Loki presented. They were determined to break through, free themselves of him. Get back to the world. Throwing every last vestige of his energy into it, Kenshin forced the group to buck against the figurative ropes one last time.

They pulled, pulled themselves back, away…away from _Ad alta_…

Kaoru opened her eyes to see Kenshin kneeling over her, his face frantic and his body shaking with exhaustion. She could tell that she was still in her room, the blankets of her futon still tangled about her. Her skin still bared to touch his. The sounds of Yahiko, Megumi, Aoshi, Sano, and Misao all returning to the world reached her ears. The questions, the reassurances, the relieved groans.

"I was afraid that I would lose you. And I cannot do that." Kenshin said into her ear, much as he had whispered into her father's. "You promised never to leave me. More importantly, I promised never to leave you." he pulled her into his arms them, and she buried her face into his chest.

And just like that. It was over.

END.

AN – And there you have it my friends. The last chapter of "These Dreams". Its hard to realize that it's all over. That was end. All the 'i's are dotted and the 't's are crossed.

Well, don't worry. Someday that next Rurouni Kenshin story will be written and someday it'll be up here. Never fret. Either way, if you'd care to notice (and/or review…if you happen to feel like it...), I am debuting a brand new Joker/OC story. Now I know most of you are going, "Original character? No way in hell am I reading that!" But you gotta give me a chance! Right? Please!

And now, thank you, sincerely, from the bottom of my heart. I want everyone who ever reviewed or help me with this story, that I am touched by the appreciation and care that has been shown to me and my little scribbles. Thank You.

See you soon!  
Late March


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